The Art of Running
by kitkat2001
Summary: I've spent over fifty years of my undead life running from something, but with the Cullens, I finally got my chance to stop. So, maybe I didn't count on falling for a werewolf who hates my guts, or actually getting attached to people, or almost saving the world. But hey, nothing in my life has ever really gone to plan, and the truth is, I'm actually starting to like that.
1. Prologue

So, apparently love stories are supposed to start when the girl meets the guy who ends up totally changing her life, and end when they happily ride off into the sunset. So that makes two problems with my story. Because for one thing, I'm a guy, and while there are several girls that ended up changing my life, this story starts before any of them. And for another thing, I didn't exactly get the fairytale ending. I guess you could say I got the girl, but the evil vampire (that would be me, by the way) ended up living, and the hot chick totally died.

Don't worry though; this isn't a tragedy. I guess you could call it a romantic comedy, as in, all the romance is a complete joke. And while you could say there are some pretty sappy moments, there's no magical moment when the two people destined to be together first look into each other's eyes. There's no beautiful first kiss that makes everything right. And there's definitely no happily ever after where I get down on one knee and pledge myself to my beloved.

So, I guess that pretty much scared everyone off. But if you're still interested, if you still want to hear the story about how I practically saved the world (well, maybe not the world, but a lot of people) and seduced a totally hot werewolf while I was at it, stick around.

-The Art of Running-

I wasn't always a totally sexy vampire. In fact, when my story truly starts, I was just a human baby that cried too much and apparently drove my father to drink. Actually, the story probably starts when a Mexican immigrant named Sylvia gets knocked up by a factory man whose name shall not be mentioned here, bringing a beautiful miracle, aka me, into the world. Sadly, 1956 Los Angeles was not the kindest place on Earth for a single mother, so Sylvia ended up marrying the deadbeat father and giving up her dreams on becoming an architect.

Brycon Christopher Soto was an adorable baby. Or at least, I assume he was. I never really saw any baby pictures, but judging from how I turned out I must have been quite the looker. Sadly, I put quite a lot of stress on young Sylvia, who took to working as a laundress to pay off the bills her husband always brought home and to provide for her newborn child. Not the ideal childhood, but I think I turned out alright, all things considered.

I suppose there's a lot more back story than that, but it's not really important right now. Suffice to say that somewhere alone the line another baby, Calida, happened, and I ended up in the 18th street gang. (More on that later.) My father died of 'mysterious circumstances', my mother disappeared, and I raised Calida as best as I could. Then the whole vampire thing happened, and Calida- well, Calida left the picture. Cue the years of angst and self loathing, one smoking hot vampire who taught me the ways of the world but ended up nearly killing me, and then comes the part where I joined the Cullens.

I met them on my 58th birthday, still looking as young and hot as ever, and somehow I got roped into traveling with the world's most 'perfect' vampires. Don't get me wrong; it's pretty sweet to have a family with an endless supply of cash and a best friend who can shape shift into a wolf any time he wants (This is not the one I seduced, by the way), but I always wanted something _more_.

Nah, just kidding. I was perfectly content with the Cullens. But something _more_ happened anyway, and this is the story of how.

**Hey guys, thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed. I'll be posting new chapters every Friday, and I already have the whole thing written so there are no worries about a hiatus or something like that. Reviews are always welcome, both good and bad, and I look forward to sharing more of this story.**


	2. Enter the Hero

Chapter 1

Enter the Hero

Apparently the fact that I'm almost sixty years old has yet to register with any of the Cullens, despite the three months I've spent with them. I get Carlisle and Esme's thing with treating everyone like children, and I can deal with that. Rosalie is a jerk to me anyway, so I get that. But Edward and Bella shouldn't be able to look at me as if I'm a child, especially when Bella's been a vampire for a whopping three years. And Jacob, who's the only person able to put up with my antics for long periods of time, should not have been lecturing me while I was forced to sit in the back seat just because he wanted to sit next to his girlfriend.

I know I can get on people's nerves sometimes, but come on! Did he honestly think that I would piss off his little werewolf buddies so much that I would be in danger? I could handle an overgrown wolf; I had proved that to Jake enough times while play wrestling. Sure, there might have been a little cheating on my part, but it counted all the same.

"Are you even listening to me?" Jake demanded, taking his eyes off the road to glare back at me.

"Yes, I've been listening to every fascinating word of your lecture for the past hour. I'm actually taking notes."

"Ignore him, he just wants to annoy you," Renesmee said gently, squeezing Jake's hand.

"Aw, Nessie, you know you love me," I said, flashing her a smile. "And I still love you, even if you did take my seat."

"It's not your seat," Jake sighed.

"Oh yeah? Then why is their leftover blood from _my_ snacks on the leather?"

"If you stained my car, I will kill you," Jake growled through gritted teeth.

"I like to think of it more as 'our car.'"

"It is not 'our car' because you're not allowed to have a car after last time."

"Oh, come on! You crash _one_ car…"

"Three. Three cars."

"The second one wasn't so much a crash as a failed flying attempt," I protested. "Besides, no one got hurt."

"The Cullens had to pay over two million dollars worth of damage fees."

"Oh, I'm so sorry if I depleted their money stash by almost _two percent_. You know, back in _my _day-"

"Please don't," Nessie interrupted.

"Why not? I thought you liked my stories."

"Not the stories where you act like an old man."

"I _am_ an old man, Nessie darling. It'll be my sixtieth birthday soon. I'm expecting lavish presents, just so you know. And that level of old requires respect from you youngsters, so watch your mouth."

"You're a toddler with sharp teeth," Jacob snapped. "And you're going to lose them if you're not careful."

"While your concern is touching, I think I'll be okay."

"Just try not to start any fights in the first hour or so," Jake sighed.

"I get it; I get it! You're all worried because you left your second in command, Layla, or whatever her name is, in charge while you went on romantic adventures with your imprint. It's been three years, Jake; if things were going to go wrong I think you would have heard about it by now."

"Just don't screw this up for me," Jake muttered under his breath, pressing down on the gas and speeding up to a rate that was definitely not responsible when he had children in the car.

-The Art of Running-

I guess Jake's not as big of a loser to his pack as he is to the rest of the world, because they were all waiting in the driveway as soon as we arrived. It looked like someone had photocopied Jake about a dozen times and then added varying heights. There were two girls in the crowd, who I was assuming were his second in command and Sam's wife. They were pretty much the same as all the others, except way more attractive.

The minute Jake stepped out of the car he was surrounded by about a million pounds of sweaty werewolf bodies, and Nessie received the same treatment, even if there were a few wrinkled noses. I was all geared up to jump into the fray and receive my own welcome hug, but Jacob must have known what I was thinking because he glared at me and shook his hand.

"This is Bryce," he said as soon as things settled down. "He's visiting with us too."

"You added another bloodsucker to the mix?" demanded one of the angrier looking shifters.

"He keeps me around for my looks and excellent puns. I'll try not to stink too badly."

"Good luck," snorted the girl with choppy black hair and flashing eyes.

"You could always help me shower, if you think that would make it any better."

"Leah!" Jake shouted, grabbing onto her arm before she could lunge at me.

"So, you're Leah!" I exclaimed. "Jake talks about you all the time. You're hotter than I imagined."

"Can I rip his head off?" Leah demanded.

"Not yet," Jake sighed. He glared over at me. "You promised you would behave."

"I say a lot of things when I'm trying to get out of being lectured, Jakey, I can't be held accountable for all of them."

"He's not always this annoying," Jake said apologetically.

"Nah, I'm usually at about this level of annoying."

"Bryce has powers of persuasion," Jake said, ignoring me. "He can convince people to do just about anything, but he's definitely _not_ going to do that here; right, Bryce?"

"Scout's honor," I promised, holding up my right hand.

"And why should we trust him?" Leah demanded.

"I'm not asking for your trust," I said before Jake could respond. "And if you feel like I'm working my vampire mojo on you, just rip my head off. That'll send the message pretty quick. I don't have any hidden agenda; I'm just here for the food, and the chance to laugh at Jake."

"Why can't he stay with the Cullens?" asked yet another angry wolf.

The Cullens were staying at the house that they had owned back when they lived in Washington, hoping to avoid the notice of the locals. Nessie could pass off as Jake's new girlfriend, and no one knew me, so we were free to roam the town to our heart's content.

"Look, it's not up for debate," Jake snapped. "You don't even have to acknowledge him if you don't want to. Now are we going to stand out here all day, or do I get to put these bags down anytime in the next century?"

The next half hour was a blur of moving bags and giant werewolf bodies that didn't seem to stop. I had thought abs like that only existed in photo-shopped magazines and movie stars, but apparently all werewolves got the insanely attractive gene. Except for Jake; I still maintained that I was better looking than him.

I ended up getting a small room in Jake's house that was probably meant to be a closet instead of a bedroom. It didn't matter much anyway; I didn't sleep, but I still liked having somewhere to stay in the dead of night when no one else was awake. It was probably a good thing I didn't sleep, because the old bed looked like it would collapse from an ounce of weight.

Jacob's pack was having a bonfire in honor of his return, so as soon as we were finished unpacking everyone went down to the beach. All of the werewolves seemed to have a problem with walking near me, or looking at me, or even thinking about me, so I immediately attached myself to Nessie's side.

"So," I began as I watched her load a single hotdog onto her plate. "In a fight, who do you think would win? Shifters or suckers?"

"I'd rather not think about it."

"See, that's your problem: no imagination."

"I think your problem is too much imagination."

"Aw, you can never have too much imagination!" I laughed as I bounded over to join her as she moved to on one of the logs surrounding the fire. "How else would I entertain myself whenever one of the Cullens or your boyfriend lectures me?"

"You could always listen."

"At least you have a sense of humor."

Nessie smirked, looking down at her food to hide her laughter. "Jake's just trying to make sure everything goes well. He has a lot to worry about what with the po- what with everything going on."

"Speaking of our beloved Jake, where is he?"

I hadn't seen Jake since the bonfire first started, and now that I was truly looking I could tell that a few of the other shifters were missing too. "It's a bit classless to ditch your own party."

"He probably just wants to catch up with Sam."

"And he can't do that here?"

"I thought you didn't need him?" Nessie smirked. "Aren't you supposed to be entertaining all on your own?"

"Just so you know, I can see what you're doing; distracting me with an insult to my honor to stop me from asking about Jake. But, I'm totally taking the bait. I'm amazingly entertaining."

"I'm going to take your word for it before you break into song right here and now."

One of the other shifters, Seth, I think his name was, came over to greet Nessie, and then our conversation was over. It had gotten late without me noticing; the stars were beginning to peak through the misty sky, their reflections twinkling on the almost black ocean. If I were human, I would probably be cold, but as it was it was pleasant. The girl from before, Leah, sat a little ways away from everyone else, curled up in the sand and staring at the water.

She was almost exotically beautiful, especially with the moonlight casting her face into sharp planes of light and shadow. There was an undeniable strength in the way she held herself, a quiet assuredness that promised pain to anyone who was stupid enough to mess with her. I might have stared at her for a bit too long, because after a while she turned to glare straight at me, her eyebrows raised in a challenge.

Nessie elbowed me in the side before anything else could happen. "Bryce! Did you hear a word I just said?"

"Not really, no."

"It's getting pretty late. Do you want to go back to the house with me?"

Now that I looked around, I could see that almost everyone else had already left the beach, and only Leah, Nessie, and I remained.

"Yeah, sure." I stood up gingerly, kicking the sand off of my feet and glancing at Leah one last time before following Nessie away. She was still staring.

-The Art of Running-

It turned out the old bed could support my weight, despite the fact that I felt like I was going to fall at any moment. The room didn't have any actual lights, just an old lamp in the corner that worked perfectly for reading when everyone else was asleep or otherwise occupied.

I probably wouldn't have been that big of a reader if it weren't for the whole 'no sleep' thing, but as it was I needed something to keep the boredom at bay. I made it through about five chapters of _Dune_ before the words started to blur on the page. It turned out I wasn't suddenly regaining my ability to get sleepy; the light bulb in the lamp was dying. There wasn't much point in waking Jake up and risking walking in on him and Nessie just for a new bulb, so I put the book away and rolled over in the bed.

Back when I was still human, I could fall asleep within seconds, no matter where I was. Sleep was hard to come by when every hour of the day was spent either looking after my little sister or finding a way to bring some money home, so I had quickly learned to appreciate every second of it. Now, I was glad that I didn't sleep. It wouldn't be worth the nightmares.

These were the times that I hated the most: the hours just after midnight when the whole world was too quiet. Humans, and vampires, for that matter, weren't meant to exist in absolute silence. Silence begged to be filled, and all sorts of thoughts could seep into the emptiness that it left behind.

In the years after I first changed, I hadn't stopped moving for a moment. At first it was all running, trying to escape what I had done when I first woke up with that insatiable thirst, and then it was just a constant cycle of finding a goal and fulfilling it. Then came Freda, a vampire who knew everything there was to know and showed me how to fill the silence.

Freda loved to talk, and I loved to listen, and for a while I thought we could live like that forever. Maybe she didn't truly care about me, but she cared about my powers, and that was almost the same thing. I would have been content to follow her forever.

Now, I was left on my own to fend off the silence. Sometimes, when I listened hard enough to the sounds of breathing that filled the house, the quiet roars of engines on the highway, the far off sounds of the ocean, those sounds could be enough. But in the end, the silence always won.

**Thanks so much to everyone who followed, favorited, and especially reviewed. I hope you like the first real chapter, and I will continue to update each Friday. Reviews are always welcome!**


	3. The Art of Wooing

Chapter 2

The Art of Wooing

By four in the morning I couldn't stand lying on my bed with just my thoughts to keep me company any longer, so I risked walking in on Jacob and Renesmee to find some entertainment. Thankfully they were both fully clothed and asleep, although Jacob seemed to wake up the moment I entered the room. I have no idea how he got so jumpy; I had only dumped ice water on him a few times, and the squirrel incident was a one time thing.

"Hey, Bryce," he said, his voice still scratchy from sleep. "How was the bonfire last night?"

"It was fine. I'm sure it would have been even better if the guest of honor actually showed up."

"I wanted to catch up with Sam," Jacob said, using the voice that meant 'there's something I'm not telling you but we're both just going to pretend you don't know that.'

"Well, while you were gone I bonded wonderfully with absolutely nobody. To tell you the truth, I can't actually tell most of your pack apart. They all kind of fall under the category of 'angry Native American underwear model.'"

Jacob sighed, running a hand over his face to clear the sleep from his eyes. "Good to know you're making an effort here."

"Hey, at least I can tell the girls apart. Leah, your second in command? She's scary."

Jake shrugged. "Leah can be a little intense sometimes, yeah."

"Intense? I thought she was going to rip my limbs off just for staring at her for too long."

"You probably annoyed her."

"I didn't even talk to her!"

"Your general presence is pretty annoying, if we're being honest here."

"Who's being honest?" Nessie asked, stirring in the bed for the first time. "Oh, hi Bryce."

"Hey, Ness. You look lovely this morning."

Nessie smiled at me sleepily, pushing her tangled hair out of her face. "And you look flawless, as always."

"Don't encourage him," Jake protested. "He already thinks he's some kind of Adonis."

"Hey, mirrors don't lie. Or photographs. Or multiple women."

"So, other than Bryce's huge ego, what were you two talking about?" Nessie asked as she pushed the covers aside and stood up on slightly shaky legs.

"Bryce is terrified of Leah," Jake replied.

"Hey! I never used the word terrified!"

"Leah's nice once you get to know her," Nessie said absently, moving over to the still unpacked suitcase propped against the wall and sifting through it.

"Yeah, well everyone is nice to you, so I can't really trust your opinion," I teased. "Is there any particular reason why she would hate me, or is it just the general hatred of vampires that everyone in this charming little town has?"

"Probably the second, but don't worry; she'll find plenty of reasons to specifically hate you if she just gets to know you," Jake said.

"You're such a good friend, Jake," I grinned. "Unfortunately, I'm going to have to leave your delightful company for now."

"Where are you going?" Jacob asked suspiciously.

"Oh, you know, just going out to eat some bunnies. Maybe some puppies, if I really need my strength."

"You're disgusting," Nessie said from the corner, where she was somehow managing to change shirts without ever actually being shirtless.

"The woods around here have a good supply of deer and small prey," Jake said. "Just don't annoy the patrol if you run into them."

"Don't you worry, Jakey. If I see a werewolf I'll be sure to turn tail and run in the opposite direction, looking as guilty as possible."

"Just don't get yourself killed," Jake grumbled, turning his back on me in an obvious dismissal.

"You got it, Captain," I replied, giving him a quick salute before racing away to find the unlucky deer that would be my breakfast.

-The Art of Running-

Adjusting to life in La Push was surprisingly easy. Most of the shifters hated me on pure principle, but the town was interesting enough even without the supernatural creatures. The constant rain made it possible to actually spend long amounts of time outside for once, and soon I found the perfect spots for reading, swimming, and practicing my newest passion: yodeling. If the spot for the last activity happened to be directly under Jacob's bedroom window, well, I couldn't help that the acoustics there were amazing.

I guess I've always been good at falling into routines without much trouble. Everyone always talks about going against the norm, standing up and being your own person. But honestly, I've found that it's a lot easier to just go with the flow. Rebels and revolutionaries may end up in the history books, but they also end up dying young. And frankly, I plan on living for a lot longer than a measly sixty years.

Besides, going with the flow doesn't mean blending in. Sure, I might have taken the path that was expected of me my entire life, but I excelled at it. First it was as the delinquent kid who couldn't even speak English right: just another thug and vandal like all the rest. But I guess I made a particularly good thug, or maybe my graffiti spoke to people, because I was only twelve when I got picked up by the 18th street gang. Not that that was unheard of; kids started young on our side of town.

It's not like I was insanely loyal to them or anything like that. I guess I never really bought into the whole 'brotherhood' thing, but it gave me protection and a knife. And with good old Dad coming home drunk more often than not, protection couldn't be taken lightly.

I rose through the ranks with a combination of some skill and mostly luck. I could handle a knife as well as the next guy, and I was quick enough to grab someone's wallet while they were too busy watching Terry juggle matches. But I probably wouldn't have gotten anywhere if it weren't for the extreme stroke of luck that came in my dad mouthing off the wrong guy in a bar one night and getting a knife in the back the next morning.

I know; I know. May God strike me down for doing something so awful as to imply that my father's death was a blessing. But to be honest, it really was. Mamá gave me such a beating that I couldn't sit down for a month when I asked her why she wasn't happy Dad was gone. But he was a drunk asshole, and even though I had nothing to do with his death, I was temporarily a suspect, and the fact that I had a complete alibi for that night didn't stop me from getting street cred.

After the whole human phase ended, I fell into a new routine as a vampire almost just as easily. I made a perfect second in command for Freda. She was the first to clue in to my new ability to persuade someone to do just about anything, and she made quick use of it.

Freda liked expensive things. I think she was poor when she was human, and she reveled in the ability to have whatever she wanted. But she insisted that we never steal anything. I had to ask, and of course I would receive, and she would purr that I was simply wonderful. I think, in her eyes, I was just another expensive thing. Or maybe an unlimited credit card.

That was about as innocent as it got. Usually, I was less of a credit card and more of a weapon, convincing entire covens to turn on each other if they so much as thought of turning against her.

And now I was slipping into the routine of La Push as easily as breathing. Not that I breathed. Maybe the fact that I grasped onto new lifestyles so completely should have worried me, but I was never one to get caught up in the small stuff. Besides, La Push had one thing that made it all worth it.

Leah.

Leah was hot. Maybe not in the immediate, knock your socks off, kind of way, but it was still there. And I wasn't one to deny myself the simpler pleasures in life, so I spent plenty of time observing the curve of her mouth and the flash of her eyes and the way that she always looked like she was about to kill someone. Which shouldn't have been as attractive as it was.

Leah also hated me with a passion, which just made her all the more alluring. I made a habit of appearing wherever she went with convenient excuses like "I was looking for Jake," or "I got lost on my way to the kitchen," or "This is actually my favorite spot for my early morning yoga." She didn't suspect a thing.

But I was never one for just looking, so soon I worked my way up to actual conversation. Which, admittedly, didn't go so well the first couple of times.

"What are you doing here?" Leah sighed, looking up from the magazine she was reading.

"Just taking a walk on the beach."

"This is my front porch."

"Really? Wow, I really need to get better at directions. Did you know one time I tried to go to Canada and ended up in the Caribbean?"

"That's literally not possible."

"Yeah, well, they both have a lot of C's and A's."

"Is there an actual reason you're here? Or are you just making it your life goal to annoy me?"

"I told you, I was looking for the beach. I'm going to collect shells and make a necklace, and them I'm going to convince Jake to wear it and say it's a friendship necklace."

"I literally don't have the energy to deal with you right now."

"No worries, I have enough energy for the both of us. I just drank like three gallons of blood."

"I'm going to attack you if you don't leave in the next three seconds."

"I thought you didn't have any energy?"

Leah was actually a lot faster than she looked, because I really wasn't expecting it when she punched me. After that I got the hint that she might not have wanted company at that exact moment in time, and resolved to catch her at a more convenient hour. Apparently right before patrol didn't count as convenient.

"What are you doing here, leech?"

"Just taking an early morning jog!"

"It's three in the morning."

"It's never too early for fitness! I have to get up early if I want time to do my pilates."

"Could you leave before I rip your throat out?"

"Wow, someone's grumpy. Did Jacob tell you about your shirts? Because I swear, I didn't know that the laundry machine would do that."

"What about my shirts?"

"Nothing! Just ignore my wild ramblings."

"I always do. Now leave; I need to get started."

I stared at her blankly for a few seconds before her words clicked. "Oh! You need to wolf out. And that requires a lack of clothes. What, are you insecure? Because honestly, I don't judge at all-"

Leah made me pay for the clothes she ripped when she phased and tore my legs off.

After that Jacob took me aside and gave me the talk about how not everyone wanted to be romantically pursued by an epically hot vampire, and Leah was his second in command and I was going to mess up the whole group dynamic and blah blah blah. I tuned him out after the first few minutes, but I did stop showing up at Leah's house at creepy hours of the night. Apparently the Edward Cullen approach didn't work on everyone.

The fact was, I was happy at La Push. Sure, Jake was suspiciously disappearing at all hours of the night, and my newest infatuation hated me with a passion, but all in all it was probably one of the better situations I had ever been in. Plus, the Cullens preferred to stay up in their old house, so I didn't have to deal with the constant judgment for not being absolutely perfect.

There was a wonderful freedom in being able to do almost whatever I wanted, especially to Jacob. My particular vampire skill set always came in useful whenever I was bored and Jake was ignoring me.

"Jaaakkeeee," I groaned. "I'm bored. Entertain me."

A loud clang and a combination of curse words that even I had never heard before came from beneath the old car that Jake was working on.

"When did you get here?" Jake demanded, crawling out from under the car and glaring at me as he wiped a smudge of grease off of his forehead.

"I've actually been following you around for the past week, now. I'm surprised you haven't noticed."

"Seriously, Bryce, I'm busy."

I hesitated. I could have Jacob entertaining me in a second, but that would mean using my abilities to manipulate his thoughts and desires, an invasion of his mind that he might not be able to put aside. Eh, he's forgiven me for worse.

"Are you sure?" I asked, letting some of the natural silk slip into my voice. "Are you really that busy, Jake? I think you actually want to go cliff diving with me. That sounds like a really fun idea to me."

Jake paused, his forehead creasing in a frown. "That- that does sound kind of fun."

"Of course it does! And you know, I'm totally cool letting you tag along, since you're obviously bored with the car."

Jake began to nod slowly. "Yeah- yeah, okay. Let me change, first."

"I knew you would be up for it!" I grinned, slapping him on the back.

Jake paused, frowning again. "You totally just used your powers on me, didn't you?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, but we both know you'll have more fun with my idea than that old pile of junk."

"Just don't do it again," Jake grumbled as he put aside his tool and began to move towards the door. "Or I'll rip your head off."

"Absolutely, my dear friend. I swear I won't even think of using an ounce of my power on your extremely susceptible mind."

Jake rolled his eyes. "Just hurry up before I change my mind."

I grinned as I bounded after him, already whistling a tune. Being a vampire definitely had its perks, and I was never one to balk at using them.

**Hey guys, thank you so much for all of the follows, favorites, and reviews. I'll be on vacation next week, so the next chapter won't be posted until the following Sunday. I hope you guys enjoy, and reviews are always welcome.**


	4. Betting on Myself

Chapter 3

Betting on Myself

When I was nine years old and my mother first announced that she was having another baby, I thought my whole world was ending. I had been the thing that ended her life: the baby that destroyed her chances at going to school and left her stuck with my father, so why should this one be any different? And then Calida was born, and my whole world ended. And then it became something so much better.

Calida was a beautiful baby right from the start. The thing I remember most from that time was her smile, always there no matter what was going on around us. She reminded me of my mother, dark skin with even darker hair and bright brown eyes, only Calida still had hope in hers.

Calida gave my life a new purpose. Finally there was a living, breathing reason to keep on moving, to keep on trying. My mother had already given up her own dreams, and even at nine I was already stealing food when the grocer's back was turned and nearly failing at school, but Calida- Calida was a clean slate. She was something that we could both pour all of our hope into.

Calida was three when our father died, old enough to know that something had happened, but still so young that she hadn't yet learned to fear him, and she never learned to grieve him. She was seven when our mother died of a heart attack, too young to have to go through that but old enough that the world forced it on her anyway. I was sixteen, already out of school and doing everything I could to make sure she stayed warm and fed. If that meant my activities with the 18th street gang escalated until it was no longer just a rumor that gave my name fear, well, that was a sacrifice I was willing to make. Calida was the light of my life.

But I've never really been good at holding onto things that matter to me, and Calida was no exception. Fact is, I'm no good at commitments. Sure, I'll slip into roles easily enough, but after a while everything blurs together until it's hard to remember why I try so hard. Besides, whenever I start to get comfortable, things have a tendency to go to hell.

Maybe that was why I liked Leah so much. No matter what I did, I could be sure that she would never make it easy for me. The challenge of just a short conversation with her felt like a breath of fresh air, actually having to work to get what I wanted. Maybe I was just spoiled from my persuasive powers.

Jake was the first to notice my suddenly upbeat attitude, but his reaction was less that of someone happy for their friend, and more of suspicion. I guess I couldn't blame him; the last time I was that happy he ended up with purple hair for a month.

For the first few weeks he resisted the urge to demand why I was suddenly so cheerful, but after I got up early to make Nessie and him breakfast for the third day in a row, he snapped.

"What is up with you, dude? I feel like I'm living in some nineties sitcom!"

"What, is it so wrong that I want to do something nice for my best friend?"

"Yes! It is very, very wrong, because I still don't trust you with cooking after the house in Montana-"

"The firefighters put it out just fine!"

"-and you're only this happy when you're planning something!"

"Jake, I'm offended," I said, placing a hand over my heart in mock hurt. "Maybe I'm just happy that everything's going so well. You and Nessie are happy together, the Cullens are off curing cancer or whatever they do in their spare time, and Leah is-"

"Leah! So what's what this is about! I already told you, your whole 'courting ritual' is beyond creepy. Leah's already told me three times that she won't be held responsible if you end up mysteriously dead."

"And that's a risk I'm willing to take!"

"Look, man," Jake sighed, rubbing his forehead like he was a middle-aged parent instead of an immortal werewolf, "do yourself a favor and just move on. It's never going to happen."

"That's what a quitter would say. See, this is why you never got Bella."

"Seriously?" Jake scowled.

"Okay, sore subject, I get it. But I'm always up for a good challenge."

"And that's about the only thing you and Leah have in common. You two are literally different species; species that are mortal enemies of each other, I might add! Leah isn't just some fun game you can play because you're bored. She can take care of herself, and she won't hesitate to kill anyone who hurts her. You could both come out of this seriously injured."

"So what you're saying is Leah likes challenges?"

"Is that seriously the only thing you got out of that?" Jake demanded.

"No, no, I can see this working. I've been going about this all wrong. I've made my feelings for Leah so clear; she doesn't have to put any effort into it. What's in it for her if no work goes into it?"

"That's not at all what I was saying!"

"So what I need to do is make things interesting. Raise the stakes."

"Please, stop," Jake moaned.

"A bet! No one can resist a bet. I'll make Leah an offer she can't refuse, and then after I win the bet and get to take her on a date, she'll have no choice but to realize how awesome I am!"

"I'm done," Jake muttered, standing up and throwing his hands in the air. "Just leave me out of it."

"Sure thing, Jakey Boy," I grinned. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a werewolf to seduce."

-The Art of Running-

I found Leah just outside the woods, pulling a sweatshirt over her damp skin and shaking the knots out of her hair, clearly just finishing up with patrol.

"Leah!" I grinned, bounding over to her side. "You're exactly the person I wanted to see."

"That's funny; you're exactly the person I didn't want to see," Leah snapped, glaring at me from under her sweat soaked hair.

"You look great this morning," I persisted.

"I just finished a three hour patrol. I'm covered in sweat and dirt, and I've been sweating so much that the stink has literally made my nose go numb."

"Eh, shifters stink to me all the time; I can't smell any difference," I shrugged. "And the sweat and dirt only highlight your beauty."

"Do you actually have a reason for talking to me, or are you just desperate, as usual?"

"Just wanted a chance to see your beautiful face."

Leah rolled her eyes. "Honestly, you're little crush is getting kind of annoying."

"Getting? I really need to step up my game if you're only just now getting annoyed."

"Let me rephrase that: it's pathetic."

"Too bad I'm not a werewolf, or it would be _puppy_ love." I might have laughed a bit too hard at my own joke, because when I caught my nonexistent breath, Leah was gone.

-The Art of Running-

After the events of the morning, I realized that I would have to fully focus on Leah, and not just my amazing puns, if I wanted my plan to succeed. For some strange reason people can only stand to be in my company for a few hours before they need a break, so I decided to leave her alone for the rest of the day so that she would be in a better mood when I made my move.

I spent the day hunting so that I wouldn't get distracted by the blood of a squirrel or something like that when I talked to her, although it was hard to resist binging on some human blood so that my eyes would be a romantic, blood red hue. I waited until evening when the whole pack was gathered at Sam and Emily's house before approaching her. She was standing a little ways away from everyone else, glaring at her drink as if it had done something to personally offend her.

""What are you doing?" she asked as I walked over, not looking up from her drink.

"Just making some polite conversation."

"Great. Are you done?"

"Okay, I lied. I came over here for more than just your excellent dinner conversation skills. I actually had something I wanted to ask you."

"No, you can't borrow my eyeliner. Emily already told me what you did to hers when she let you use it."

"Okay, that was a one time thing, and I didn't expect Jacob to thrash around so much. But that's not actually what I'm here for."

Leah let out an exaggerated sigh. "Let's just get this over with. Tell me what you want and then leave."

"I want to have dinner with you."

Leah stared at me for a few seconds. "You- you don't even eat."

"I don't sleep either but that doesn't mean I don't want to do it with you."

"I'm leaving."

"Wait!" I shouted, nearly grabbing her hand before remembering that such an action would probably result in losing a hand myself. "Hilarious sexual puns aside, I do want to get dinner with you."

"And why on earth would I willingly spend extended amounts of time with you?"

"Aw, come on, you don't even know me. Just give me a chance."

Leah blew air through her nostrils in frustration, raising her eyes to the sky as if praying that something would come down and save her from talking to me. "Exactly. I don't even know you. You don't know me. This?" She gestured sharply between us, nearly taking my head off in the process. "This is an infatuation. You don't have the first idea about who I really am."

"But I want to know you! I want to know every little thing about you, all your weird quirks and little habits and deepest secrets."

"Tough luck."

"But you never even gave me a chance!"

"I don't owe you a chance."

I paused. "Okay, you've got me there. And I swear, I'm not going to be like one of those douchebags who acts like you owe me a date just for existing. But I really do want to get to know you."

Leah raised her eyebrows, clearly unimpressed. "Is that supposed to make me like you? You don't get points just for being a decent human being. Not that you're a human. Or decent."

"Another good point. But I'm willing to put in the effort for this. Tell you what. Give me one week, just one week, to find out three important things about you. Not your birthday, or favorite color, or trivial things like that, but three truly meaningful parts of your personality. And if I can do that, and you agree that those things are true, then you have to go to dinner with me. Just one date, and no physical contact necessary. Besides, if you decide that I'm too disgusting to spend a few hours with anyway, you can just say that I'm wrong no matter what. It's a win-win situation."

Leah paused, considering it. "And if you lose? What do I get out of this?"

"If I don't have anything by the end of the week, I'll back off completely. I won't even look in your general direction if you don't want me to."

Leah sucked in her lower lip in thought, looking me up and down. "Deal. You tell me three important things about myself, and I might, just might, go out to dinner with you. And if I decide that you're wrong, I never have to talk to you again."

"Excellent," I grinned, extending my hand to shake on it but slowly letting it drop back down when Leah glared down at it in disgust.

Sure, maybe I had just made one of the stupidest bets in my life. Maybe there was no way Leah would ever go out with me, and I was just wasting my time. But in my eighty years of life, I've made some pretty stupid bets. And I still wouldn't bet against myself.

**Hey guys, sorry for the long wait, and thanks so much for all the lovely reviews. I hope everyone who celebrates Easter had a good one, and as always, reviews are welcome.**


	5. Love Lives and Besties

Chapter 4

Love Lives and Besties

My first ally in my quest to win Leah's heart would, obviously, be Jacob. He was probably the closest person to her, besides her brother, and I knew he would never let me down. Okay, so there was a very real possibility that he would just laugh in my face and leave, but it was worth a try.

He wasn't in any of his usual hangouts, and when I asked Nessie she just got really red and started stuttering out excuses in the way that she always did when Jake asked her to lie, so eventually I resorted to hunting him down by tracking the disgusting smell of wet dog. I found him farther out in the woods than I expected, almost completely secluded from society. I slowed down as soon as I could hear his breathing, still at least fifty feet away, and listened carefully. Jacob wasn't alone, but the other presence was about as human as me.

"…just not sure if it's a good idea," Jacob was saying, the edge in his voice obvious even from so far away.

"It's a calculated risk," the other person responded, and I immediately recognized the voice as Carlisle.

"But what if it ends up in the wrong hands?"

"The whole point of this is being able to stop the wrong hands before-" Carlisle stopped suddenly, and all I could hear was Jake's heavy breathing.

"Brycon," Carlisle said after a moment. "How long have you been listening?"

I flashed to their side in an instant, putting on my best winning smile. "I just wanted to talk to Jake. All I heard was something about hands."

Carlisle hesitated for a moment, staring me down as if his gaze alone could magically make me tell the truth. Which, not going to lie, kind of hurt. Sure, lying came naturally to me, but I made a point of not lying to him. He was the whole reason I had this makeshift family, and I wasn't about to throw it away.

"Look," I sighed. "I have no interest in whatever schemes you two are cooking up. I'm completely focused on seducing Leah. So unless your little secret will make her fall in love with me, I don't care. And even if it was a love potion, that would feel a bit too much like cheating."

Carlisle exchanged one last glance with Jacob before flashing away, gone before I even had the chance to say goodbye. Jacob waited until he was gone before he turned back to me, taking a deep breath.

"What did you do this time?" he sighed, running a hand through his hair.  
"What makes you think I've done something?"

"Because that's your "I need a favor" face, and the favor is usually getting you out of trouble."

"I'm insulted. Why can't I just want to spend time with my best friend?"  
Jake raised an eyebrow skeptically.

"Okay, you've got me. I need you to tell me about Leah."

"What, you mean you haven't already learned everything from stalking her?"

"I don't stalk her," I scoffed. "I just happen to show up wherever she is at random intervals throughout the day. But that's not the point. I convinced Leah to go on a date with me if I can tell her three important things about herself in one week. That's where you come in."

"You want me to help you trick Leah into a date with you? I don't hate her."

"It's not tricking! She knew exactly what she was signing up for when she agreed on the bet. If she underestimated me, that's her fault."

"Dude, I'm not telling you Leah's secrets."

"Oh, come on! You share a mind with each other every time you wolf out; you have to know something juicy."

"Yeah, and I'm not telling you. If you want to win the bet, do it on your own. And don't blame me when she ends up ripping your limbs off."

"I've had plenty of chicks do that to me. It's a sign of affection."

Jacob rolled his eyes and pointedly turned away.

"Fine," I pouted. "I'll do this myself."

It's kind of hard to stomp away at super speed, but I managed.

Maybe Jacob was right. If I really wanted to connect with Leah, I should find the three things on my own. Cheating on this would only end badly, and listening to Jake might be the best thing to do in this situation. Or, I could just find a werewolf less reserved about giving out pack secrets. Yeah, definitely the second one.

-The Art of Running-

Shifters have this weird loyalty for their pack leaders, which meant that anyone in Jacob's pack was pretty much out if I wanted to find out more about Leah. Fortunately, Sam had had almost nothing to do with me since I first arrived, so he probably hadn't warned his pack about me as severely as Jacob had.

I'd like to say that I put a lot of thought and reason into the wolf I decided to approach, comparing all of the possible outcomes and only making a decision once I was adequately informed, but the truth is I just chose the first person I saw. In this case, it happened to be Brady Fuller.

I found him sitting on a bench near the beach, probably doing homework or something unimportant like that, but he froze the moment he sensed my presence. I slid into the seat next to him, putting on my best "I'm not here to kill you so please don't run away" grin.

"Hey, Brady. I've been meaning to talk to you."

Brady stared straight ahead, but his wildly tapping foot betrayed his calm façade.

"Relax," I laughed. "I swear I'm not the evil vampire Leah makes me out to be."

"Jacob said that I'm not supposed to talk to you."

"That's because Jake's afraid you'll realize I'm cooler than him. Tell you what, I promise I won't use my freaky vamp powers on you if you promise to have an actual conversation with me."

"Why do you want to have a conversation with me?"

"What, I'm not allowed to bond with the pack?"

Brady raised his eyebrows at me silently. "Okay, you've got me," I laughed. "Maybe I'm trying to prove to Leah that I can be friends with other shifters besides Jake."

"So you chose me?"

"Well, you're only a few inches taller than me, as opposed to the foot that everyone else has on me, so I figured our friendship was meant to be."

"And what makes you think I want to be friends with you?"

"Why _wouldn't_ you want to be friends with me? I have access to every single one of the Cullen's cars, and I won't freak out if you crash a few of them. Plus, I can make patrol way more interesting."

"So basically you're bribing me with fancy cars to pretend to be your friend to spite Leah?"

"I knew I liked you for a reason. Are you in?"

Brady considered it for a moment, cocking his head to the side. "Exactly how many cars will I have access to?"

"Oh, my boy," I grinned, clapping him on the back, "you have no idea. But, now that we're besties, we have to do things that besties do. And that means talking about girls. Or boys. Or whatever your into."

Brady narrowed his eyes. "This _is_ just about getting to Leah."

"So? A lot of great friendships are based off of ulterior motives. And this can be a two way conversation. Tell me about your love life. Are you youngsters still into the whole arranged marriage at the age of nine thing, or have you moved on since my day?"

"Jacob said that you were born in the fifties."

"Oh, look who's suddenly the expert on history. Which one of us lived it, kid?"

"I don't think what you did could technically be considered living."

"Hey, I had a solid twenty two years worth of wholesome, human life. You know, back in _my_ day-"

"Sorry," Brady interrupted. "But Jacob told us that if you ever start a sentence like that we should just run as fast as we can."

"Since when are you and Jacob such great pals, huh? I thought _we_ were besties. Am I not enough for you? I swear; I can change!"

Brady seemed a bit unimpressed by my incredible devotion to our friendship, so I decided to try a different tactic.

"Okay, so maybe love lives aren't really your thing-"

"I never said that!" Brady said quickly. "I mean, I never said I don't have a love life. I do. Have a love life."

"Wow, I'm totally convinced."

"I do! I just haven't told anyone about her yet."

"Is it because she doesn't exist?"

"She does exist! She's just- she's different. I just don't want to tell anyone yet." Brady furrowed his brow. "Wait, why am I telling you?"

I shrugged. "I've got no idea, kid. I just started this conversation to trick you into telling me about Leah."

"What do you even want to know about Leah? Haven't you learned enough from stalking her?"

"Why does everyone keep saying that? It's not stalking!"

"It kind of is."

"Oh, what, so Edward Cullen does it and it's romantic, but when I do it it's 'creepy' and she's 'justified in ripping my limbs off'?"

"Yeah, pretty much."

"I should've known," I muttered. "It's the hair. If I had hair like his I bet Leah would love me."

"If it makes you feel any better, I think she would despise you no matter what kind of hair you had," Brady said helpfully.

"Thanks, pal. See? This friendship is helping already."

"Yeahhhh," Brady said slowly, probably struggling to comprehend just how awesome his new best friend was. "I kind of need to finish this essay, so…"

"Say no more," I said quickly. "I'll leave you to suffer alone, and then we can talk again later when it's convenient for me."

"Thanks?"

"That's what friends are for," I said, clapping him on the back to show my support and then speeding off.

All in all, I think it was the beginning of a beautiful new friendship.

-The Art of Running-

That night there was another bonfire, and this time Jacob actually deigned to grace us all with his presence. I think it was supposed to be one of his 'pack bonding things', which basically meant everyone paired off into groups of two or three to do their own thing while I followed Nessie around the whole time because she was one of the only people that would talk to me.

Normally, I would be spending that valuable time working on wearing Leah down, but I was already pretty occupied with finding out three important things about her, and I've noticed this weird phenomenon where people tend to attack me if they spend too much time around me. Nessie and Jake seemed to be the only ones immune to it, but even they had their limits sometimes.

I'm not sure if it started when I became a vampire, or if I just perfected my ability to annoy people over the decades. I guess I must have annoyed my father, at least enough to drink, but I think that was more my general existence than any one aspect of my personality. And my mother kind of had to love me, but she didn't really live long enough to see me develop into my full level of sarcasm and hilarious wit.

I think the only person truly immune to my ability to irritate was Calida. Of course, I don't think it was really possible for her to get angry. She had one of those personalities where she never really got mad, which is annoying on everyone else but great on her. She also completely adored me, but I think that just comes with being a younger sibling. She followed me blindly, maybe a bit too much, and never seemed to noticed all the times I screwed up.

Sometimes, I almost see her in the way Leah looks at Seth. I've spent plenty of time, maybe an unhealthy amount, looking at Leah, so I've kind of memorized her expressions when talking to other people. Usually it's just a mixture of disdain and boredom, but something in her softens when she's with him.

And that's the thing about siblings that Jacob and Nessie and the others will never really understand. Love is possible in all forms, and it can be extremely strong even without a blood connection, but the moment you have a younger sibling you inherit a basic responsibility. Leah had that responsibility, just like I had it before I screwed everything up.

Being an older sibling becomes a part of you, no matter how long it's been. So maybe I did know something about Leah, even if it was hard to recognize at first. Seth would always be a part of her, just like Calida would always be a part of me. And I wanted to know every part of her.


	6. The Art of Running Away

Chapter Five

The Art of Running Away

The next day I stayed true to my word and showed up at Brady's house at the bright and early hour of eleven am, driving the shiniest of the Cullens' cars I could steal without them noticing. He came out after only about thirty seconds of my laying on the horn, scowling as if he weren't absolutely delighted to see me.

"You ready to go for a drive, buddy?"

"Please don't call me that."

"Aw, come on, pal. Part of a strong friendship is cool nick names."

"I think you and I have different definitions of cool."

"Look, man, it's not my fault I have trouble connecting with today's youth. Just get in the car and pretend to like me."

Brady considered it for a moment, and then grabbed the keys from my hand and climbed into the front seat.

"Woah, woah, woah," I said as he reached to put the keys in the ignition. "Aren't you going to adjust the mirrors?"

Brady gave me an odd look before doing as I suggested, then started the car and began to back out of the driveway.

"Um, your hands do not look like they're on ten and two."

"Are you serious?"

"As the only responsible adult currently in this vehicle, I feel that it's my duty to make sure you don't kill yourself in a car crash, indirectly killing me once the Cullens see what I did to their car."

"Dude, I've had my license for over a year."

"Is that supposed to comfort me? I've been driving for _decades_."

"Did they even have cars in the fifties?"

"Have you even taken a single history class?"

"I've been a bit distracted lately, you know, with turning into a werewolf and all…"

"Jacob says the politically correct term is shape shifter."

"Do you have to put a lot of effort into being this annoying, or does it just come naturally to you?"

"It's actually a lot of work, thanks for noticing."

"How has Leah gone so long without murdering you?"

"I don't know, but I just take it as another sign that we're meant to be," I grinned.

"We all have bets on how long it'll take her to snap and murder you," Brady said, sounding completely serious. "Jacob only thought you'd last three days."

"Well, Jakey is always underestimating me. He once lost five hundred bucks to me betting that I couldn't drive a car so fast it went across water."

"You actually did that? And it worked?"

"Nah, but after I lost I convinced Jake to just give me the money anyway."

"You're insane," Brady laughed. "Like, clinically insane."

"How do you think I've survived pursuing Leah for so long? Any sane person would have given up after the third or fourth time she tried to kill me."

"Why haven't you given up?"

I shrugged. "I don't know, I usually choose not to question my insane urges. Maybe I've just got a thing for women who want to kill me."

"Well, you can't blame her for acting tough. Leah's been through some pretty screwed up things. Even if you push the whole Sam and Emily thing aside, she still has to deal with what happened with her dad and all."

"What happened to her dad?"

"Wait, you don't know?"

"I think what most people don't understand is that while I'm annoyingly great at stalking, I kind of suck when it comes to finding out actual information."

Brady frowned, chewing on his lip in hesitation. "Mr. Clearwater, he- he died a few years ago. She was the first in her family to phase, and no one really expected her to- well, no one's ever heard of a female shifter. Mr. Clearwater never had the best health, and the shock of seeing his daughter phase instead of his son… He died of a heart attack, and the whole thing made Seth phase, too. Leah blames herself for it. She always used to think-"

"I understand," I interrupted suddenly.

Logically, I should be thrilled. Brady was finally opening up about Leah, and I was actually getting somewhere in my quest for information for once. But this was private, the kind of thing that should be shared in the middle of the night in whispers or after the first few glasses of wine, not something I should be hearing from a kid who barely knew her and was still mastering the art of staying in one lane while driving.

"Let's talk about you," I said, maybe a bit too loudly. "Tell me about your imaginary love life."

"She's not imaginary!" Brady protested.

"Yeah, I'll believe it when I see it."

"She's just- she's older, okay?"

"Seriously?" I whistled. "You're dating a cougar?"

"She's not a cougar!"

"How old is she? I'm guessing late forties, early fifties. Probably has a boob job and some botox, looking to feel young again after her divorce from her wealthy husband…stop me if I'm wrong."

"It's not like that!" Brady laughed, taking one hand off the wheel to give me a playful shove that nearly sent me out of the car. "She's not that old."

"Yeah? Give me a number."

"I- I'm not exactly sure-"

"You're dating a woman who's clearly older than you and she hasn't even mentioned her age? What do you guys even talk about, taxes? The difficulties of senior year versus retirement?"

"This is why I haven't told anybody yet."

"Why, because they might try to attack you with 'logic' and 'basic common sense'?"  
"Are you really one to talk, Bryce? Can you honestly judge anyone for their love life? Because I'm pretty sure yours just consists of staring at Leah when she's not looking and following her around like a lost puppy."

"You know, I bet it's that cougar of yours that's gotten you so snarky. You've changed, Brady."

"You've known me for two days!"

"And yet I can already see what being with her is doing to you. Is she jealous of our friendship? Is she the one that's been driving us apart? You know, that's one of the number one red flags, when a partner tries to end your friendships."

"Our 'friendship' is just you using me to get to Leah and letting me drive the Cullens' cars in return."

"That's irrelevant. I want to meet her."

"You're not meeting her," Brady laughed.

"Afraid to introduce her to your close friends? That's red flag number two."

"Bryce, and I mean this in the nicest way possible; I don't really care about what you have to say about her."

"So, what, she's suddenly more important than me? You're choosing some old woman trying to relive her youth through you over me, one of your closest and best friends?"

"I feel like maybe you're a bit more invested in this friendship than I am."

"And to think I stole a car for you!"

"I don't think you really understand how friendships work."

"Nonsense! I've had at least two fully functional friendships in my life! Three, if you count a drunken hook up back in the fifties. We continued to work together and watch each other's backs with minimal awkwardness!"

"Like I said, I don't think you have a good grasp on the whole friendship thing."

"I resent that," I pouted. "But if all I am is a free car source to you; I'll just be quiet and let you drive."

That lasted for all of five minutes, but surprisingly it was Brady that broke the silence this time, slowing down as we passed a diner and glancing over at it.

"I'm starving. Do you want to get something to eat?"

"Oh, this is awkward. Look, Brady, you're really cute and all, but in case you haven't noticed, I'm kind of obsessed with Leah."

"That's not what I-"

"Don't get me wrong, if circumstances were different…"

"Please stop.

"And anyway, I think you're a bit too young for me."

"Please, please stop talking."

"I mean, you're a really great guy, and perfectly attractive, and I'm sure there are tons of other fish in the sea…"

"If you don't stop talking I'll probably wreck the car just to put myself out of my misery."

"Brady I know rejection is tough, but there's no need to do something that drastic."

"I'm getting something to eat," Brady grumbled, pulling into the parking lot. "You can go hunt some squirrels if you're hungry."

"Brady, now that you're one of my best friends, I feel that you should know I prefer bunnies and puppies."

Brady ignored me and got out of the car, walking so fast that it almost seemed like he didn't want me to catch up with him. Nonsense, of course, because I'm a great dining companion. I don't actually eat, so I just have even more time to entertain whoever's stuck with me. Honestly, Brady had really hit the jackpot when he got me as a friend.

-The Art of Running-

Lunch with Brady actually turned out to be pretty fun, even if he did pretend not to know me for the majority of the meal and ask for a different table at one point. After lunch I was able to drive him home and return the car without the Cullens noticing, even if Carlisle did seem suspicious when I said I was just hanging out in their garage because it had good acoustics.

All in all, the drive was a success, even if I did cut Brady off before he got to the juicy stuff on Leah. Despite the fact that I'm perfectly willing to cheat on almost anything else, something about learning her deepest secrets from a seventeen year old kid just seemed wrong.

Besides, I had at least some idea of how she felt. Maybe I never experienced the trauma of phasing for the first time, but the transition from human to vampire hadn't exactly been a walk in the park. And it ended just about as well as Leah's phasing did.

-The Art of Running-

It had all started as a job. Just a simple delivery job, no more dangerous than anything else we did. We were expecting rival gang members, rusty pocket knives and one or two pistols at the most. None of us were expecting to become a vamp's next meal.

It happened too fast to react. One second I was joking with the guy next me, turning to make sure no one was coming up behind us, and the next the whole world exploded into a chorus of screams and a gut wrenching pain in my neck that sent me flying into a nearby wall.

I had known pain. And I was good at taking it, bending with the blows of fists and kicks, letting it move through me without overcoming me. I had certainly had enough practice, but that was with the dull, blunt force of hands and feet, not this ripping agony.

When I was eight, I pushed my father too far when he was shaving, and it ended in seemingly endless tears and messy stitches up and down my cheek, because my mother had no way of getting us to the hospital and we wouldn't be able to pay the bills anyway. This was a bit like that, only so much worse.

At first there was only red: flashing red eyes and red blood gushing out of my neck and a red haze only broken by the screams of the others. There was a hand on me, my neck wrenching at an impossible angle and for a moment everything was blissfully black. And then the true pain came.

They say that the transformation is the sharpest memory anyone has of their human life. And maybe that's true, but that indescribable pain, that feeling of my veins turning to fire and burning alive, it all pales in comparison to what happened next.

I don't know how long it lasted. I remember the agony of putting one hand in front of the other, dragging myself across the ground what felt like days later, every cell in my body screaming for relief, for _something_. I don't know how I got back to the apartment. All I remember is clawing at the door, too weak to reach the handle, and then slumping into the pool of red as everything finally went black.

-The Art of Running-

I woke up to a barrage of sights, sounds, and smells, but a thirst like I had never known overwhelmed everything else. Everything zeroed in on the deafening pulses of a beating heart, the sound of blood gushing through veins and breaths so loud they filled the entire apartment.

I was moving before I could even comprehend what was happening, one sinuous leap and tackle, and for one moment there was nothing more than the basic movement of predator and prey. And then I was biting down into soft, warm flesh, and everything came into focus as I finally found relief in the warm, thick liquid that rushed into my mouth.

I drank as if I were starving, my hands moving to find a better grip on my prey as it struggled weakly against me, little hands beating against my chest as I pulled it closer. There was nothing but my thirst and the need to sate it, and it seemed like only a few seconds had passed before the blood flow began to slow and the struggles faded away until my prey hung limp in my arms.

-The Art of Running-

The pain of transformation might be indescribable, but nothing compares to the feeling of looking down at the corpse in my arms to see my little sister. That is pain, and no amount of physical agony could ever come close to that. I wish I could say everything after that was a blur, but I still remember every excruciating moment as I realized what I had done, as the blood in my stomach suddenly came rushing back up, my desperate retching staining her sickly white skin a dark red.

After that, I ran. I ran as far as I could, my new speed and strength barely registering as I did everything I could to put myself as far away from her corpse as possible. Back then I still thought it might be a dream, that it was all just a horrible nightmare and I would wake up to Calida holding my hand and snuggling next to me in bed.

But I never woke up, just kept on running. Running and running and running, never able to even look at human blood again without seeing her sightless eyes staring back at me. And the truth is, I don't think I ever stopped running.

**Hey guys, sorry for the irregularity with posting in the last few weeks. Things should be back to normal now. Thanks for all the follows, favorites, and especially reviews. I hope you enjoy, and, as always, reviews are extremely appreciated. **


	7. A Day of Games

Chapter 6

A Day of Games

Jake began to mysteriously disappear more and more often. I'd think he had a secret girlfriend or something if it weren't for the fact that he was totally whipped when it came to Nessie, and Carlisle and Sam always just 'happened to be busy' whenever Jake was gone. Nessie didn't seem too worried about it, and I think Jake might have told her to keep an eye on me, because she always wanted to 'hang out' whenever he was gone.

Today's entertainment of choice was card games, mainly because it was pouring rain outside, the cable was out, and Leah was on patrol, so I had none of my usual distractions. I know; I know. I'm the old one, which means technically it should have been me teaching Nessie all about how to have fun without technology. But I have an incredible ability to adapt, which pretty much means I've become completely dependent on technology and have almost no idea about how to function without it. Nessie, on the other hand, has a weird obsession with board games and cards, and finally roped me into playing a game of War.

I would like to say, for the record, that there was no cheating in that card game, at all. No matter how much Nessie might like to say that I "didn't shuffle right" or "convinced her to give me all of her good cards" or "flipped the table over when it looked like she was going to win", I won based purely off of skill. Nessie is just a sore loser.

After several more failed games of Go Fish, and one instance where someone, and there's no need to name names, threw several of the cards in the disposal, Nessie decided it would be better if we just "caught up," which was code for talking about Leah.

I'm not really sure what Nessie thought of my pursuit of Leah. On the one hand, she was always nicer to me than Jacob, so she wouldn't out right call me stupid or childish. On the other hand, she always got a sad, slightly disapproving expression when I talked to her about it, but she got that look during most of our conversations, so I couldn't really go off that.

"I heard about your bet with Leah," she said conversationally.

"You don't look very thrilled."

"I just think you should be careful, that's all."

"Nessie, don't worry. I've had plenty of experiences with girls trying to kill me; this is nothing new. Besides, I think I'm starting to grow on Leah. She doesn't try to dismember me nearly as much as she did in the beginning."

"It's not you I'm worried about."

"Wait, what?" I paused, waiting for Nessie to burst into laughter, but she continued to stare at me, completely serious. "You're worried about Leah? Nessie, I couldn't hurt her even if I wanted to, which I very much don't, by the way. Leah could easily take me in a second."

"I'm not talking about just physical strength-"

"Neither am I! Leah isn't some fragile little flower who will break the moment someone pushers her too far. Trust me, Nessie, if someone is going to come out of this with a broken heart, it'll be me."

"Bryce, this isn't a joke!"

"I'm not joking!"

"Bryce, I need you to understand. Your infatuation with Leah-"

"Okay, I think infatuation is a bit of a strong word. It's more of a small obsession, or extreme fondness, or-"

"Bryce, this is what I'm talking about! You can't turn every conversation into a joke."

"I can't help my natural hilarity! And I'm taking you seriously; I really am. I just don't think your right."

"Just listen to me for a second, okay?"

"Fine," I grumbled, throwing myself back in my chair and assuming my best 'I'm paying attention but also pouting in a manly kind of way' expression.

"You're infatuated, Bryce. You see Leah as this amazing, indestructible woman who can't be stopped by anything. And she acts like that around you, but that doesn't mean she can't be touched. She's already had her heart broken once."

"What, by Sam?"

"Oh, don't act like you don't know, Bryce. We all know you've spent the past few days finding out everything you can about Leah."

"Yeah, but everyone kind of just laughs in my face when I ask about her. I might look like I know everything, Nessie, but that's not always the case."

"She and Sam were in love, and then he imprinted on Emily. There's more to the story than just that, but this whole thing has been hard for her."

"And yet she's still incredibly badass. I'm not seeing the problem here."

"The problem is that everything in life isn't a game, Bryce! This might all be some fun distraction to you, a way to entertain yourself while Jake's too busy to play with you, but it's not to her!"

"You think I'm playing a game?"

"Do you ever do anything else?"

"I did a lot worse than play games before I met you!"

Nessie froze, her face twisting into the closest thing I had seen to a frown since I met her. "Well I wouldn't know, would I? You haven't exactly been open about your past."

"And there's a reason for that," I said, forcing as much seriousness into my tone as I could muster. "Trust me, Nessie, there's a reason. But trust me in this, too: I'm not playing with Leah."

Nessie stared at me in silence for a moment, chewing on the inside of her cheek. "I believe you," she said at last. "Or at least, I think you believe what you're saying is true. But this can't be just another thing where you go crazy for a week or so and then lose interest."

"Believe me, Nessie, once I'm attached it is painfully impossible to get rid of me."

"Just be careful, okay?"

"Sure thing, Ness." I flashed her my most reassuring smile and then went to the door. "I'm going for a walk."

"It's pouring rain outside."

"Then I'm going for a swim. I promise I won't do whatever it is Jake doesn't want me to do."

I sped away before Nessie could begin to protest about Jake keeping secrets, because I can only handle serious conversations for so long, and Nessie had used up all of my willpower already.

The thing was, I understood what she was saying; I really did. But the Leah Nessie talked and worried about wasn't the Leah I was chasing after. That may have been Leah three years ago, but no one stayed the same for that long. And no matter how much a broken heart might hurt, it didn't last forever.

Not to say that pain like that didn't last. But it didn't dominate a life, especially someone like Leah. I had heard what the others said, about how Leah still struggled to forgive Emily, still couldn't look at her sometimes. But maybe it was more than that. Leah didn't base her whole life off Sam, so that couldn't be the only thing she saw in Emily. Maybe it wasn't what Emily had, but what she represented. A life without phasing.

-The Art of Running-

The rain relented by the end of the day, just in time for dinner at Sam and Emily's. Not that I ate, but it was another chance to see Leah, so there was no way I was missing it. I finally cornered her in the living room, despite her numerous and very skilled attempts at ignoring me.

"Leah, my love, I've been looking for you."

Leah rolled her eyes, letting out a sigh that had to last at least thirty minutes. Honestly, I was more impressed by her lung power than anything. "What do you want, Bryce?"

"Have you forgotten our little bet already?"

Leah raised an eyebrow. "It's only been four days."

"What can I say? I'm an overachiever."

"Let's get this over with," Leah sighed. "Go ahead and tell me your three things so that I can reject you and move on with my life."

"That's not a very positive attitude to have," I scolded. "You should have more faith in me."

"Oh, I'm sorry; let me make myself clear. I have absolutely zero faith in you. I honestly believe with all of my heart that you will fail miserably."

"Aw, babe, thanks for being honest with me. That's the foundation of every good relationship, you know."

"Do you actually process what anyone says to you, or does your huge ego filter everything into praise?"

"Thanks, I do have great eyes."

"Even this thirty second conversation with you is exhausting. If you're ever wondering why people don't enjoy talking to you, this is it."

"I appreciate your concern, but I know exactly how annoying I am. It's my special power. You know, the one trait that a vampire carries over into their next life, only magnified times ten?"

"So, what, the whole magical persuasion power is just a side thing?"

"I think what others misinterpret as a magical ability is really just people being so dazzled by my amazing good looks that they'll do anything I say."

Leah almost laughed at that one, but managed to quickly return to a glare. "I can only stand you for about five minutes at a time, and you've already used up half of that. Better get to the point."

"Hold on, let me gather my thoughts. I spent like three hours rehearsing this in front of the mirror last night."

"Tick, tock, tick, tock…"

"You made me forget my opening joke! How am I going to soften you up now?"

"The more you talk the less I like you."

"Alright, alright. I'll be serious now. My first thing is your brother."

"My brother?" Leah asked skeptically. We both turned to look over at Seth, who was standing with Embry and Paul and laughing so hard it looked like he might fall down any second. Leah's eyes softened automatically as she watched him, the smallest of smiles making its way onto her lips.

"He's a part of you," I continued. "I mean, you might feel like ripping his head off half the time, and he sure as hell doesn't recognize half the things you do for him, but it doesn't really matter in the end. He's your little brother, and you'd do anything for him."

"What, that's your first fact? That I have a little brother? Hate to break it to you, Bryce, but that's kind of common knowledge."

"Never said I was going to find out your deepest secrets. I said I would find out three important things about you. And being a big sister is one of the most important things you are, at least in your mind. That never really goes away."

Leah pursed her lips, looking unimpressed. "Alright, fine, I'll give you that one. But that's just a pity win, because there's no way you're coming up with anything beyond that."

"You shouldn't underestimate me so much, dear. Are you ready for fact number two?"

"Enlighten me."

"This second one is a bit more heavy. Your dad."

Leah's expression closed immediately. "What about my dad?"

"You think you killed him."

"Alright," Leah said, standing abruptly. "You've had your fun. I'm done now."

"Wait!" I reached out to grab her hand, barely stopping myself before she took my arm off. "I'm serious."

"So am I."

"Leah, I'm a vampire. And I'm not some perfect angel like the rest of the Cullens; I don't have a clean slate. I've done awful things; I've killed people, and I live with that every day. But the difference between you and me, Leah, is that I truly killed people. I wasn't just there; I didn't just contribute to it; I killed them with my own hands and I felt their lives leave their bodies.

"You didn't kill your dad, Leah, no matter how much you might think so. Heart problems killed your dad, or the spirits, or whatever twisted thing decided to make you phase. Not you. But you still live with that guilt, and I understand that, because that guilt is a part of me, too."

Leah remained silent, staring at me impassively and making it impossible to tell what she was thinking.

"And the final thing. Not loosing Sam. Not falling in love and then loosing it. Because I might not know everything about you, Leah, but I know that you're strong. Stronger than a broken heart, that's for sure. And the others might think that you're still caught up on him, still trying to move past what the imprinting did to you, but I don't. Maybe it still hurts, but that's not what you're afraid of.

"You're afraid that something within you broke, when you became a wolf. You're not jealous of Emily because she has Sam, you're jealous because you think she has a future that you might never have. Children."

We stared at each other for a moment, the silence growing heavier and heavier with every passing second. Leah looked like she was either going to rip my throat out or walk away, and I wasn't really sure which option would be worse.

"You don't have to go along with the bet," I said as the silence became unbearable. "It was stupid anyway. I just wanted you to know."

I turned to go, but froze as an iron fist closed around my arm. "I don't back out on bets," Leah growled, looking murderous. "But if you think I'm wearing a dress, you're even stupider than I thought."

That was probably the part where I was supposed to say something incredibly smooth and romantic, but all I could really do was stare at her and grin until Leah sighed and walked away. Sure, maybe it wasn't the most conventional way of getting a date. But I was going on a date with Leah Clearwater, and for the moment that was all that really mattered.


	8. Freaks

Chapter 7

Freaks

I arrived at Leah's house precisely thirty seconds before the time I said I would pick her up, dressed in the best suit I could steal from the Cullens and balancing a bouquet of roses that was bigger than my face in one hand while I knocked on her door with the other.

Seth opened the door while I was halfway through knocking, freezing when he saw me. "Bryce? What are you doing here? And why are you so dressed up?"

"I'm here to pick up the lady of the house, if I may. We have a date."

Seth hesitated. "You're…my sister…date…wait, what?"

I nodded solemnly. "Oh yeah, your sister and I are desperately in love. It's kind of hard with the whole werewolf-vampire, star-crossed lovers kind of thing, but we're making it work."

"Don't listen to him, Seth!" Leah called from within the house. "I'm just going on a pity date with him, nothing more!"

Seth raised his eyebrows at me. "You actually won the bet?"

"Never underestimate me, Seth my boy."

Leah came to the door and shoved Seth aside. "Beat it, this is awful enough as it is."

I nodded at her. "You look beautiful."

"You have to say that."

"Yeah, but luckily for me, you actually are beautiful, so I don't have to face the moral dilemma of lying or not. I brought you flowers." I stuffed the bouquet of roses into her hands.

Leah made a face. "Roses, really? Wow, so original."

"Hey, I'm showing you the generic date experience. You want something else; we're going to have to make it to an anniversary. Then I'll throw in some jewelry too."

Leah rolled her eyes. "Can we just get this over with?"

I smiled. "Sure. I stole a limo for us to ride in." Leah stopped in her tracks, staring at me.

"Kidding," I laughed. "I borrowed one of the Cullens' cars."

"They didn't mind?"

"They aren't, in the strictest sense, aware of what I did."

Leah gave a grunt of disapproval. "If you were going to steal something anyway, you might as well have gotten a limo."

"I'll keep that in mind for the second date."

"There isn't going to be a second date."

"Not with that attitude there isn't. Loosen up a little, try to enjoy yourself."

I grabbed her hand, but she ripped it free and stalked up ahead to the car. "Where are we going, anyway?" she demanded, settling into the passenger seat.

"It's a super secret surprise," I whispered, slipping into the drivers seat as smoothly as I could and revving the engine.

"I swear to God, if this is a puppet show-"

"Okay, in my defense, I honestly thought Jake would enjoy that as a birthday present. But rest assured, this is much fancier than that. I actually ran it by Jake first, just to make sure you don't have some weird fear of silverware and chandeliers or anything."

"So we're going to a restaurant."

"Curse your razor sharp intellect! I thought it would take you at least twenty minutes to figure that one out. Which, coincidentally, is the amount of time it'll take us to get there."

"Just kill me now," Leah moaned, dropping her head to the window and closing her eyes as if silently preparing herself for the night to come.

* * *

We ended up making it to the restaurant in less than fifteen minutes, probably because every time the speedometer dropped below sixty Leah would glare at me until we sped up. I tried to entertain her with some charming stories with my childhood, but apparently an overworked mother and douchebag father don't make for the best fond memories.

The restaurant itself was a nice place, overused Greek architecture with a doorman who wrinkled his nose while taking our coats and a waitress who seemed more interested in her nails than finding us a table made for a good classic first date experience. I managed to beat Leah to the table and pull out her chair for her, and her glare was a little less angry than usual, which obviously meant she was beginning to realize how attractive I really was.

The waitress took our drink orders in record time considering I had to correct what she wrote down three times, and tossed our menus down on the table with just the right amount of disdain to communicate that this place was obviously too good for us.

The low lighting of the place just made Leah look even more striking, and the flickering candle illuminated the disgust in her eyes beautifully. I might have spent a bit too long staring, because after a few minutes she coughed uncomfortably and stared pointedly at the menus. Luckily I've always been good at taking hints, so I grabbed a menu and leaned back in my chair casually.

"So what looks good to you?" I asked, flipping through the menu and trying to look nonchalant.

"Nothing. I don't even want to be having dinner with you right now," Leah grumbled.

"Hey, I won the bet fair and square. I get a date; whether you like it or not. And I'm going to make you enjoy yourself, even if it kills me."

"Actually, that doesn't sound too bad. You dying probably would make this date a little more enjoyable."

"You're such a romantic," I sighed. "I think I'm going with the steak, extra, extra rare. Get it?"

"You're not funny," Leah said, not looking up from the menu.

"I'm absolutely hilarious, thank you very much. Jacob loves my jokes."

"That's because Jacob isn't funny either. You're paying for this, right?"

"Yep."

"In that case I think I'll just get the most expensive thing on the menu."

"Classy," I mused. "Don't worry; I think my credit card will be able to handle it."

Leah snorted "You mean the Cullens' credit card?"

"I'll have you know that I earn my own money."

"Yeah right. Have you ever worked a day in your life?"

"Well, not 'work', exactly. It's more a matter of me asking people for money and then them giving it to me."

"You disgust me."

"I'm kidding," I said quickly. "My stealing days are long gone. Honestly, I kind of hated it."

"Really? You hated being able to have anything you want with just a few words?"'

I shrugged, suddenly uncomfortable. First date talk was supposed to be playful banter and innuendo that would most likely get me slapped later. Not something that actually got close to home.

"I just got tired of it after a while; that's all." That, and the fact that whenever I asked a stranger for something I could practically feel Freda standing behind me, purring in my ear.

"Must be nice, being privileged enough to get tired of getting whatever you want."

"It is," I said quietly, serious for what might have been the first time that night. "And I'm aware of that. I wasn't just born this rich and sexy, Leah. We all have our sob stories."

"Yeah? What's yours?"

I snorted, quickly looking back down at the menu. "Kind of heavy first date talk. Those kind of conversations are usually saved for the middle of the night where we're too tired to think about consequences."

"I think you've mixed up deep conversations with something else."

I raised my eyebrows. "I don't know what kind of shenanigans _you've_ been getting up to, but I'm a perfect gentleman."

Leah rolled her eyes. "Oh, I'm sure. I think you're just making up excuses for the fact that you probably haven't been kissed for the past century."

"You are severely underestimating me. Not all vampires are as traditional as the Cullens, and certainly not all vampires have mates. I haven't been too lonely over the years."

"Isn't that kind of a first date no-no, talking about previous conquests?"

"Once again, I'm giving you the generic experience. And seeing as I'm a male I find it necessary to prove myself to you by claiming I'm sexually active. Because everyone knows that the amount of action you get is directly correlated to your manliness."

A loud cough alerted us to the fact that the waitress had returned and was staring at both of us with a look caught between disgust and morbid curiosity. "Are you ready to order?" she demanded.

"Absolutely, my good lady," I said, snapping the menu shut loudly. "I'll have your finest slaughtered cow, soaked in whatever sauce you're offering and cooked only past what is considered necessary."

The waitress stared at me for a moment while Leah coughed to muffle her laughter. "So, a rare steak?"

"Extra rare. So rare that you can practically hear it moo."

The waitress rolled her eyes in a way that was somehow still dignified and turned to Leah. "And you?"

"Um, I'll have the grilled beef tenderloin," Leah said, handing her the menu and blushing as the waitress stalked away.

"She thinks we're freaks," she hissed at me.

"Is she wrong?"

"I don't know why I expected any different! Of course you would find the nicest place within a fifty mile radius and embarrass me there!"

"Relax, Leah. It's not like what she thinks of us actually matters."

"It matters to me! Sorry that I haven't had sixty years to adjust to being a freak!"

"Okay, first of all, I'm only fifty nine. And it's not like a thick skin comes from practice alone, although believe me, I've had plenty. I grew up in 1950's Los Angeles, Leah; not exactly the most Hispanic friendly place. I've been called my fair share of names, and that's before leech and bloodsucker got added to the mix. There came a point when I realized that I'm better than everyone else anyway, so who cares what they think?"

"Wow, that sounds like a really healthy mindset."

I shrugged. "I'm not going for poster boy of good attitudes or anything. I just do what works for me."

"Well maybe I'd rather not get used to being the freak."

"Fight it or accept it, love; it's not going to change the way people see you. The only thing that can change is the way you see yourself."

"You sound like a poster in a guidance counselor's office," Leah snapped.

"Where do you think I get all my ideas?"

This time Leah couldn't quite muffle her laugh.

"See?" I grinned, leaning back in my chair with pride. "You think I'm funny."

"I'm laughing at you, not with you."

"I'll take what I can get."

"I still don't like you," Leah warned. "Even if you do give somewhat decent advice."

"Baby steps, Leah," I grinned. "Baby steps."

* * *

Dinner actually ended up being pretty good, despite the fact that I didn't actually eat any of mine and Leah flipped me off every time she thought I had been staring at her for too long. Our waitress grew more and more disgusted as the night went on, and eventually devised a frankly ingenious path around the restaurant that avoided our table completely. It took me four tries to get her attention long enough to ask for the check, and she maintained a slightly scary death glare the entire time.

"So, I know spending your evening with me is probably the last thing you wanted to do tonight," I began as I scribbled my signature onto the receipt, "but did you have at least a mediocre time?"

Leah sucked in her bottom lip, pretending to consider it. "I no longer want to gouge my eyes out with the spoon, if you count that."

"Success in my book," I grinned, waving the waitress over. "I promise I won't embarrass you this time."

Leah hesitated, watching the waitress turn towards us with a sigh and begin to make her way over. "You know what?" she murmured quietly, the corner of her mouth turning up in a smile. "Maybe I'm not the one who should be embarrassed."

"Excuse me, miss?" she asked loudly, waving her hand wildly as if the waitress hadn't yet seen us. "Do you think I could get a doggy bag?"  
The waitress froze, her nose wrinkling in a mixture of confusion and disdain. "A- a doggy bag?"

"Yeah, you know, something I can bring the rest of this here cow home in? I've got a dog, Buster, and he just loves fancy restaurant food."

"I- I don't think that's-" the waitress began, but I quickly interrupted.

"Aw, surely you can make an exception for us? I just know it would mean the world to old Buster. He always gets gassy after eating cheap steak, and we're all out of air fresheners."

The waitress was slowly turning redder and redder. "Sir, this is a five star establishment-"

"Which is why I want to take it home!" Leah added, her smile transforming into a full blown grin. "Only the best for my Buster!"

"I really can't-"

"It's fine," I interrupted. "We can just stop by the rib place on the way home; their sauce is better anyway."

We were standing before the waitress could respond, Leah muffling giggles while I stuffed the paid bill into the waitress' hands and stumbled away from the table, barely managing to contain my laughter.

"You're awful!" Leah laughed as soon as we were out of the restaurant.

"And you're a genius! She looked like she was about to burst a blood vessel!"

"I can't believe you said that part about him getting gassy! I thought she was going to throw us out right then and there!"

I opened the car door for her, still grinning like crazy. "I have to say, that's probably the most fun I've had at a fancy restaurant in the last half century."

Lean smiled for almost the rest of the way home, only remembering in the last five mile stretch that she had a reputation of being humorless to uphold. She was frowning again by the time we reached her house, but a twinkle in her eye betrayed her look of disproval.

"So, this is usually the part where I walk you to your door and kiss you goodnight," I began as I pulled into her driveway. "But, I figure your brother is probably spying on us through the curtains, and you've given me a few subtle hints that you'd rather kiss a poisonous snake than me, so this is where I'll say goodnight."

Leah allowed herself a small smile at that. "As far as first dates go, you didn't do too bad, freak," she said softly, and before I could react leaned across the car and gave me a miniscule kiss on the cheek, dashing out of the car and over to her front porch before I could react.

"I had a good time too," I said softly, looking at her one last time before pulling out and driving into the night.


	9. Death and Deadlier Things

Chapter 8

Death and Deadlier Things

I spent the rest of the night and most of the next morning lying on my bed at Jake's, staring at the ceiling and replaying every moment of the date in my mind. Cliché, yes. Pathetic, maybe a little. But it was no secret that I was maybe a little bit infatuated with Leah, and if my heart beat I was sure everyone in the house would have been able to hear it.

If it were up to me, I would have went over to Leah's ten minutes after the date ended. But I was pretty sure that there was some strange date etiquette that said you should wait at least a few hours before contacting the person again, so I held off until morning. Then Nessie gave me a talk about how I shouldn't come off as desperate, despite the fact that I totally was, so I opted for a drive with Brady instead.

He seemed pretty excited to see me, or maybe just the car, but either way he wasted no time in getting it out onto the road, nearly running over three different animals and denting at least one mailbox along the way.

"Who taught you to drive?" I demanded.

"No one technically _taught_ me…"

"Are you serious? How is it possible that you have a license?"

"Sam is good friends with the guy who does the tests, so he kind of goes easy on us. I'm not _that_ bad.

"Brady, there's a reason that every other car on the road is giving you a fifty foot radius. That's not normal."

"Oh, like you could do any better?"

"I have never once gotten a ticket, thank you very much."

"That's because you just persuade all the officers to let you off with a warning every time you get pulled over!"

"That's irrelevant. I've been driving for decades, and you've got to be one of the worse drivers I've ever- watch out for that tree."

Brady swerved back onto the road, nearly colliding with the car in the lane next to us before straightening out.

"Keep you hands on the wheel," I said patiently as Brady tried to flip the other driver off while they hit their horn.

"Just for future reference, that thing hanging in the middle of the road is called a stoplight, and when it's red you're usually supposed to stop."

"You were distracting me!"

"You're driving off the road again."

"Give me a break!" Brady moaned. "I'll do better once we reach the highway."

"If we live that long."

"You weren't complaining last time we went driving!"

"Yeah, that's because last time I was using you to get information on Leah, and I was perfectly willing to die for my cause. Now I'm hanging out with you because I've inexplicably started to like you, so I'd prefer it if neither of us died today."

"Aw, that's sweet," Brady said through gritted teeth as he swerved back into his own lane while the truck behind us honked wildly. "Just so we're clear, I'm still just using you for the Cullens' cars."

"I wouldn't have it any other way. That was a stop sign, by the way."

"I kind of paused!"

"Brady, I'm starting to think you didn't read the entirety of the Washington Driver's Manuel. Full stop, man, full stop."

"If I wanted to be criticized the whole drive I would have invited my dad along."

"And if I wanted to die I would have annoyed Leah while we were around fire. Actually, now that I think about it, a car crash wouldn't really do that much damage. I mean, you might die, but I'll probably walk away unharmed either way. So go crazy with the driving; I'll be fine."

Brady muttered some choice words under his breath that I pretended not to hear, but drove more carefully until we reached the highway.

"Alright," he sighed after a few minutes of silence. "Get on with it."

"Get on with what?"

"The whole pack knows you went on a date with Leah last night. Just tell me every excruciating detail and get it over with."

"I don't _have_ to tell you about it."

"Good, because I'd rather not-"

"Alright, if you insist. Brady, my boy, do you know what love is?"

"No, but I have a horrible feeling you're about to tell me."

"Love is what Leah and I have."

"You've been on one date," Brady sighed. "And she doesn't even like you."

"I think she's warming up to me. I didn't get a single death threat last night. Several hints that she would be happier if I were to die, but no outright threats."

"Has it ever occurred to you that you're slightly pathetic?"

"It's okay to be jealous, Brady. Not all of us can have the dream relationship that Leah and I have."

"Dude, I have a girlfriend."

"Yeah, the cougar. How is she, by the way?"

"Still not a cougar, but thanks for asking."

"Has her husband started pressuring you to date their daughter yet? Are you secretly falling in love with her daughter? Has she threatened to reveal the whole affair and ruin your life?"

"What?"

"Never mind. That reference is lost on a young soul such as yourself. Which, by the way, is just one more reason why you shouldn't be dating a woman who's ten times your age."

"That would make her 170. That's literally not possible."

"Are you serious? We are currently a werewolf and a vampire having a discussion in a sort of stolen car. Not to mention Leah went on a date with me last night. If that doesn't prove anything's possible, I don' t know what will."

"Whatever, dude," Brady laughed. "Things are going well with her."

"At least tell me her name."

"It's Jossa, okay?"

"Sounds fake."

"It's Finnish!"

"Sounds like a fake country, to me."

"Remind me again why I'm even listening to you?"

"Because we're besties. This is what besties do."

"I'm starting to regret agreeing to be your friend."

"Most people do. But I'll make it amazing for you, while it lasts."

"Okay," Brady said abruptly. "That just got kind of creepy. I think I'm done driving, for now."

"Sure thing, buddy. I'll see you next time I feel like nearly dying on the road. Until then, best of luck with actually learning to drive and your creepy fake girlfriend."

All in all, I think it was a pretty successful friendship outing. Nobody died, which is kind of rare for me, and I didn't scar Brady beyond repair, another common occurrence. And, best of all, it had lasted long enough to allow me to see Leah again.

-The Art of Running-

I found Leah at the beach, talking and laughing with the rest of the pack. For once she chose not to ignore me, instead turning to look at me the moment she smelled me.

"Leech," Leah called, jerking her head in my direction. "Come over here."

I sped over as fast as inhumanly possible, screeching to a halt inches from her face. "Yes, my love?"

"I need you to settle an argument for me. Who do you think is faster? A bloodsucker or a shape shifter?"

"A vampire, no question."

"Wrong," Leah snapped. "We could all kick your ass in a second."

"You know I hate to disagree with you, love, but I'd have to say you're wrong in this one. Vampires are faster than shifters; that's just the way it is."

"As if! I could beat you in my sleep!"

"I don't even have to sleep!"

"You think you're so fast?" Leah demanded. "Prove it. Race me."

"Are you sure you want to go there, darling? I'd hate to burst your bubble and hurt your feelings."

"The only thing getting hurt will be your enormous ego."

I sighed, rolling out my shoulders. "You asked for it. What are the terms?"

"We race from one end of the beach to the other. No holding back. Whoever reaches the dock over there first wins."

"On the count of three," Embry said. "Three, two, one…go!"

Leah and I took off down the beach, both moving too fast to possibly be mistaken for human. I couldn't remember the last time I had pushed this hard. Everything focused on the need to move forward, the rest of the world disappearing as I dashed down the beach. Thirty seconds couldn't have passed before the dock appeared, but it felt like forever as I pushed forward with one last great leap to slam my hand down on the wood.

Laughter rang out before I got the chance to reorient myself, and I looked up to see Leah leaning against the dock casually, not one hair out of place. "Were you even trying? That was pathetic!"

"You cheated!" I protested.

"How, by being better than you?"

"I want to go again. Best two out of three."

"Fine," Leah laughed. "If you think you can handle being beaten two more times."

"Bring it," I snapped, darting forward before she had the chance to react.

"Cheater!" she shouted after me, racing to catch up.

And, okay, that might have been cheating a little, but I was still going to beat her, so that was all that really mattered. Leah was still a foot or so behind me, her labored breathing hot on the back of my neck. She was fast; there was no denying that, but my illegal head start had given me the edge I needed, and it was clear I was going to win this one.

At least, it was clear that I was going to win until Leah's hands closed around my arm, yanking me back and sending me flying into the sand.

"Hey!" I protested, grabbing her ankle before she could take off again and pulling her down with me.

Leah let out a muffled grunt as she fell, twisting so that her elbows landed directly on my stomach. I did my best to flip us over, but she tangled my legs with hers and kept me locked on the ground, playfully wrestling with me until both my hands were pinned above my hand.

She grinned down at me, wisps of hair floating in front of her face; her eyes alight with excitement as she panted with exertion. She was one of the most beautiful things I had ever seen.

I haven't had to breath for decades, but this was the first time I truly felt the lack of oxygen. It was like all the air had been punched out of my chest, my lungs contracting but nothing happening. Leah slammed my hands above my head again, grinning wildly, the sun framing her face and making the whole thing even more horribly romantic.

"You suck at this," she laughed. "How are you still alive if you get your ass handed to you every time you try to fight?"

A distant part of my brain brought up the fact that my arms were actually in a considerable amount of pain, and that I should probably say something instead of just staring at her with an awestruck expression, but I ignored it in favor of focusing on not confessing my love to her on the spot.

Leah's smile faded as she released my arms, but I couldn't seem to remember how to move them back from above my head.

"Are you okay?" she asked, something that almost resembled concern in her voice.

Normally, I would be thrilled that she seemed at all interested in my wellbeing, but at the moment all I could think of was the way her eyes shone when she was happy and the way her laugh sounded when it wasn't derisive or full of disdain.

"Bryce. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," I managed finally, awkwardly shifting into a kneeling position. "It's just been a while since I've been held down by a pretty girl; that's all."

"Gross," Leah laughed, shoving me in the shoulder as she stood up. "You're just mad because I beat you."

"You got me," I smiled weakly. "My manly ego is shattered."

Leah squinted down at me. "What's up with you? You're acting weird."

"You probably just gave me a concussion. No big deal."

"You're a vampire, idiot. You don't get concussions."

"What's that? Did you just say vampire without adding an insult or using a derogatory word in its place? Maybe I'm not the one you should be worried about."

Leah rolled her eyes. "Idiot."

"There it is!"

"I can't believe I went on a date with you."

"You loved it."

"It was tolerable. I still don't like you, though."

"That's alright. I can supply enough love for the both of us." The words were out of my mouth before I had time to process them, hanging in the air as Leah stared at me in silence.

She opened her mouth to say something, but I spoke before she could. "I've got to go. Sorry. I'll see you later. You look hot, as always. Bye."

I flashed away before she had the chance to say anything else, running as fast as I could back to my room in Jake's house. I had said the L word. No big deal. I said that all the time. I said it when I was talking about food or cars or animals or Jake or myself. It shouldn't mean anything.

Except, it did. It meant everything, because this was the first time I had said love and actually meant it. Meant it in a gut-wrenching, terrifying way that made me want to start running and never stop. Because I had loved like this before. And it was that kind of love that nearly killed me.


	10. Fighting Her Battles

Chapter 9

Fighting Her Battles

For so long I had fought to keep memories of Freda tucked away in a far off corner of my mind, but now they were all crashing down on me. Leah wasn't Freda, and I knew that, but how could I trust myself to even think of loving her when the last time I gave someone everything I had barely escaped with my life?

Freda was the first to find me after months of running from what I had done to Calida. Back then I thought she was an angel, crossing myself and babbling in Spanish, asking if she could take the demons out of me. I must have looked insane, but Freda saw something in me, something that no one, not even me, had ever imagined.

She took me under her wing. At least, that's how I thought of it. I worshipped her for the first few years, eager to do anything that might make her smile, make me feel like I could be worth something to someone. Eventually the infatuation faded, but I still followed her with everything I had. Freda was safety; Freda was home. The only home a creature like me could hope to deserve. My life revolved around her, and she was just happy to have the attention. I wasn't anything more than an interesting specimen, a credit card or a weapon.

Freda liked touching. My face, my arms, and my neck. Always my neck. She would always stroke it as she outlined a plan, praised me, told me what I was to do. And on that day, that horrible day when I told her that I wouldn't fight her battles any longer, it was my neck that she went after first. After I left her, burning, I couldn't touch my neck without remembering her. I wouldn't let anyone else so much as graze it, but it seemed like my hand had a permanent spot there, to make sure she wasn't back, touching me all over again.

Now, I was squeezing it as hard as I could, trying to force myself back into the present. But the past wouldn't stop coming; memories I had run from for years but couldn't escape any longer.

-The Art of Running-

I sat in my usual position. Legs crossed, hands clasped, head bent, eyes closed. It almost looked like I was sleeping. It was as close to sleep as I could come, anyways. It was like I was in a trance; aware of everything that was going on around me, but detached, separate. I could stay like that for hours on end, doing nothing, thinking nothing, simply sitting.

Freda lounged on the couch, flipping through a magazine at inhuman speed, laughing or hissing depending on what she read. She had an obsession with mortal things such as that. She liked to compare herself with the celebrities. Occasionally she would ask me if I thought she was prettier than them. I would always answer yes; it was what she expected, and I didn't have a death wish.

"I think we may need to do something about the Urdir Coven, Pet," she said suddenly. "They have been getting a little too powerful for my taste."

I reluctantly sat up straight, knowing that Freda would demand my attention again anyway. "I thought we were allies with that coven," I said, my tone bored as always. I couldn't remember the last time there had been life in my voice. Even the adoration was beginning to fade; replaced with a resigned detachment. Sometimes Freda could coax that life out of me, when she gave me specific assignments, but she had been doing that less and less lately.

Freda shrugged lightly, making the light yellow fabric of her dress ripple around her shoulders. "I have grown bored with them. They are not worthy allies of me. We will kill them."

I frowned slightly. I had liked the members of that coven. The leader, Budek, had been kind to me. My golden eyes had fascinated him; but instead of mocking me, he had merely stated that there were rumors of others like me. And there had been a girl, a little girl, who reminded me of my Calida.

Calida. Her name was like cool water, awakening me slightly from my lethargic haze. It was thoughts of Calida, and how she questioned everything, that brought about my next word. "Why?"

Freda's head whipped around and she stared at me in surprise. I had never, not once, questioned Freda's judgment. It surprised me almost as much as it surprised her, but I was careful not to let it show.

"Oh, Pet…why not?"

In an instant she was beside me, her cold hands running up and down my neck. It occurred to me that I didn't like it when she touched me like that. I wondered vaguely why I had never protested it before. Perhaps it was because I never really felt the need; I was too lazy to stand up to her.

"Stop doing that." I surprised myself once again, reprimanding her and moving away from her roaming fingers.

Her lips curved down into a pout, but her eyes were dangerous. "Brycon, what has gotten in to you? Is something wrong with you?"

Not 'Are you feeling alright?' or even 'Is something wrong?' She wasn't asking about my wellbeing. She was only concerned that I was contradicting her. Her perfect little credit card was malfunctioning.

"I'm just…" I struggled to put my tangled emotions into words. "I'm confused. Why are we killing that coven, if you offered them peace in exchange for favors? I thought Budek was your friend."

Freda's eyes narrowed. "_You thought._ It isn't your job to think, Pet. Besides, I have no friends, only enemies, and those who I've decided to spare."

I wanted to ask which category I fell into, but decided against it. I wasn't sure if I wanted to hear the answer, and the conversation was straying away from the main point too much anyway. "I just think that it's…wrong," I said at last.

Freda's eyes relaxed, and she laughed. It was her victory laugh. The laugh she used right before she had me destroy entire covens. The laugh that said, _Is that really what you think? You think you are in control, you think you can possibly outthink me? Watch how much I will prove you wrong._

"You think it would be _wrong_?" Her voice had a gleeful, mocking edge to it. "Oh, this is rich. _You_ think that killing is wrong. Need I remind you of what you did mere _minutes_ after your transformation? You killed your sister, Brycon, your sweet, innocent, baby sister. Do not think yourself worthy of deciding right from wrong after the murder you committed."

Her words were like physical blows. With each one I shrank, cowered, trembled at the weight of what she was saying. I was helpless, utterly useless, because she was right. I _was_ an awful person; I didn't have any right to say if something was wrong.

Freda could have won, if she left it at that. She could have left me, completely beaten and submissive once more, and we would probably have continued on with normal life. But nothing was ever enough for Freda. She had to keep on pushing. So she _laughed_, that same awful laugh full of disgust and superiority. And that was what ruined her.

Because what I had done to Calida was horrible. I was the worst kind of devil, and there was no forgiveness for a sin like that. But Freda was not better in that aspect. So many vampires had died at her word. Yes, I had killed them, but she had commanded it. And she was _not_ above me when it came to that.

"Don't you talk about my sister!" It came out as a roar, full of anger and rage and the most dangerous kind of fury. And Freda must have realized that she had gone too far, because she took a step back.

Freda, the all-powerful Freda, took a step away from me, her eyes widening with a hint of fear. She had miscalculated, and she knew it. "We are both angry; it will do us no good. Go, clear your head, we will discuss this matter later." There would be no apology; Freda never apologized, but it was the best she would offer.

I left, leaving by way of the balcony and jumping down to the busy street below. I didn't care if anyone saw me, they would come up with their own explanations of it. I did not have any destination in mind, all I did was run, through the city, around the city, retracing paths until I knew it better than most who had lived there their whole lives.

I couldn't remember the last time I had been alone with my thoughts. At first, the urge to run back to Freda and be told what to think once more was nearly overwhelming, but if I went back at that moment one of us would probably end up dead, and it wouldn't be her.

Back when I first met Freda, she had been my savior. She wasn't the villain out of some storybook; there was no black and white or right and wrong when it came to her. She saved my life, and no matter what happened I could never deny that.

For a while I must have loved her. Wasn't that what love was, needing someone so badly that you couldn't breath when they were gone? I didn't know what I was without her anymore, and I wasn't sure if I had the strength to find out.

I wish I could say I had some huge epiphany where I realized that life in itself is a gift and the only way I could be okay again was if I found a way to love myself, but life sucks and I was the last person who needed to be loved.

It was Calida who saved me. A little thirteen year old girl who loved her brother too much to be afraid even when he woke up with red eyes and sharp teeth. She should never have died, but I cut off whatever great thing she was going to become and turned into a monster. And I couldn't be that monster anymore, not in Calida's name.

I could have run away then and there. It would have been so simple; all I had to do was not go back to her. But I found myself returning anyway. I would like to say it was because I was strong, strong enough to break the hold she had over me and say no to her face. But in truth, it was because she still had some hold over me. I still felt the need to follow Freda.

When I got back, she was sitting on the couch once again, staring blankly at a magazine. Her eyes found mine the moment I entered the room, and she frowned at what she saw.

"Well?" Her voice was sharp. "Are you better? We will take the coven tomorrow; you must be ready by then."

"No." My voice did not shake as I said it, something that took an immense amount of effort.

"What did you say?" she hissed, appearing at my side. "Pet, why are you acting this way?"

I moved out of her reach once more. "I'm not your pet."

Her laughter was stiff. "Of course not, it is merely a nickname."

"Is it?"  
She frowned at my stoic response. "This is silly. You have one day to get over these…qualms, and then we will act."

"No," I repeated. "I'm done fighting your battles."

Her lips curled back into a snarl. "Think carefully before you leave me, Brycon."

"I have. I died for the gang life before, I have no wish to die for it again."

Her expression suddenly became blank. "So be it."

I turned to leave. It was only after I had taken my first step away that I remembered a vital lesson. Never turn your back on Freda. I whipped around just in time to see her hands reaching for my neck, and then she was on me.

We were rolling, hissing and snarling like tomcats. I was young and strong, but it was Freda who knew how to fight. My persuasive words had no use when the target was too busy trying to rip my head off to listen. It was all shrieks and nails and terrible screeching, and then all I knew was pain as my arms separated from my body. Freda was clawing at me, ripping off every body part that she could and muttering under her breath. She looked up once I was immobile and there was a crazed gleam in her eyes.

"You shouldn't have done that." Her voice was strangled. "Shouldn't have tried to leave me. What can you do without me? You'll just crash and burn. Burn, burn, burn. That's what you deserve. Let's see if we can find a match, shall we? I wonder how cool you'll be when you're dying. And do you know why you'll die? Because I said so. Because I said so, and what I say should be your law."

She flashed away from me and began to search the room, trying to find a box of matches. I struggled to reach my arm, willing it to move forward so I could put myself back together, but she was back before I had a chance.

A match was pinched delicately between her fingers, the little flame flickering and shaking wildly. Funny how such a small, fragile thing could do so much harm.

She held it close to my skin, taunting. "Burn, Pet," she whispered, but before she could touch me I spoke.

"Are you sure you want to do that?"

She froze, her eyes slowly glazing over. I continued, pouring everything I could into my voice. "It wouldn't be a good idea to burn me, Freda. That's not what you want. You don't want that. Put the match on your own arm."

She was like a child, her face wide with confusion as she brought the match to her own arm. "Now, keep it there," I urged her. "Don't stop, no matter how hard it gets. Why stop? It would be easier to just keep it there. Keep the match on your arm." I hesitated, and the last sentence came out of pure spite. "Burn, Freda."

I watched in fascination as she began to slowly destroy herself, her face twisting in pain but unable to stop. I was whole again soon, speeding around the room and gathering all of my meager belongings. I paused at the door to the balcony, looking back at her. The fire had eaten a path up her arm, and small whimpers escaped her mouth. I didn't know how long my effect would last once I was gone. She might die; she might survive. I couldn't stop myself from caring. But I didn't do anything about it. I just closed my eyes and jumped.

-The Art of Running-

I still wasn't quite sure who I was without Freda. I gave her more than I had to give, and I didn't think I could risk giving that much to anyone else ever again. But Leah wasn't asking for everything. She wasn't even asking for anything, but I still wanted to give it to her. Maybe that was the difference between whatever hold Freda had over me and what I felt for Leah. I had given Freda everything I could and she still wanted more, and it ran me dry. There was no balance there.

But with Leah, she gave back just as much as she took. She had plenty of strength without me, and she didn't take mine away from me. Maybe love wasn't supposed to be a desperate need, but a shared strength. Not something that could kill you, but something that made you live.


	11. The Art of Running Forward

Chapter 10

The Art of Running Forward

I was spared the awkward necessity of seeking Leah out on my own and explaining my strange behavior by Emily announcing a dinner party at her house the next night. Now, I'm not really sure why she felt the need to call it a dinner party, because the whole pack ate dinner at her house almost every night anyway, but I wasn't going to question it.

Emily had cooked enough food to feed the entire population of China, so of course it was gone in about thirty minutes. After dinner everyone just kind of wandered around the house, aware that there must be a purpose for the party but not quite sure what it was. I just hovered a few feet away from Leah the entire time, watching her out of the corner of my eye and quickly looking away every time she glanced over. Before long Emily and Sam came to the center of the room, Sam clearing his throat loudly until he had the attention of the pack.

"You're probably wondering why we called you here today," Sam said, a smile playing along his lips.

"We actually, um, we have an announcement," Emily smiled up at Sam, taking his hand and squeezing it. "I've been feeling a bit off lately, and recently Sam and I went to the doctor, and he said- well, he said I'm pregnant!"

The whole room exploded into laughter, clapping, and congratulations, and I joined in a few seconds later after I realized it was apparently a cause for celebration. Leah maneuvered her way through the crowds, grabbing Emily and pulling her into a tight hug.

"I'm so happy for you," Leah whispered into her neck, pulling back to beam at her with slightly watery eyes. "Is it a boy or a girl?"

"We want it to be a surprise," Emily smiled, looking down and rubbing her belly fondly. "But, more than anything, we want you to be the godmother. If you would."

"Of course," Leah choked out, drawing Emily back into one last big hug before letting the rest of the pack crowd around her. She stood against the wall for a moment, watching Emily as her smile wavered, and then quickly turned and went to the door, quietly slipping out.

I waited only a few moments to congratulate Emily before I hurried after her, following Leah's scent out the door and down the street. I found Leah on the beach, staring at the water with her hands clasped around her knees and her expression stoic. "Go away," she said as I approached, still not looking up.

"I just came to talk."

"God, can't you take a hint? Can't you get it through your impossibly thick skull that I'm not interested?"

"I said talk. If I came here to seduce you I would have brought roses and wine."

"I don't want to talk to you."

"Most people don't at first, but I have a habit of growing on people."

"I don't need you to comfort me, or whatever you're trying to do, okay? I'm fine."

"I never said you weren't."

"Well you're all thinking it!" Leah threw her hands up in the air in frustration. "You think I don't notice all the sad looks, like I'm made of glass and about to break at any minute? 'Oh, be careful not to mention babies, or imprinting, or marriage, or anything to do with being a woman around Leah. The poor girl can't handle it.' I know I'm a freak; I don't need everyone tiptoeing around me."

"Who said anything about that?"

Leah finally turned to face me, glaring as if she could incinerate me with her gaze alone. "Even you're not that big of an idiot, Bryce. There's no sign of me imprinting any time soon, and I can't remember the last time I had my period. You really think a baby is in the picture?"

"Why do you even want a baby?" I demanded, moving to sit next to her in the sand.

Leah snorted in disgust. "Of course you wouldn't understand."

"No, really. Having me is what ruined my mother's life. She could have been so much, but instead she got stuck having to marry my dad and working as a laundress just to scrape by. How are babies possibly worth the trouble?"

Leah looked at me disbelievingly. "You think I wouldn't give anything to have a baby? The feeling of carrying a life inside you, bringing a child into this world? But I don't even get that choice, because I'm a freak. Not that it would ever happen, because everyone knows I'm never going to imprint."

"So what? Imprinting is just a shortcut, anyway. You don't need some freaky supernatural sign to tell you if you love someone."

Leah's mouth twisted into a bitter smile. "I thought that at first, too. Who needs imprinting when love is enough? But we all saw how well that works out after what happened between Sam and me. I thought that was love, but obviously not. And now the rest of the pack has to deal with my pain. I know what they think of me. I might not be in love with him anymore, but I still love him, and they all have to deal with my inability to get over it."

"You loved him," I said quietly. "And then the universe decided to intervene and he fell for your cousin. And that was really shitty of the universe."

Leah sighed, staring straight ahead. "I don't need your pity."

"Good, because you're not getting it. I don't want to tell you it will all be okay and kiss it better; I just want to kiss you in general."

"I can't tell if you're trying to comfort me or come on to me."

"I find that a combination of the two works best."

Leah stood up abruptly, brushing off her jeans and holding out her hand to me. "I'm not going to spend my whole night pouting. Come walk with me."

I followed her obediently, stooping down to grab a rock and flicking it into the ocean as we walked.

"That was weak," Leah laughed.

"Oh, you think you can do better?"

"I know I can," Leah smirked, snatching up a smooth stone and expertly throwing it into the water. The stone skipped at least eight times before it disappeared, and Leah turned to me with raised eyebrows.

"You just got lucky," I grumbled, grabbing another stone and trying again.

"You can't possibly be trying," Leah snorted.

"Look, we're not all werewolves with super strength, okay?"

"You're a vampire. And as much as I stand by the fact that shifters are stronger than leeches, my powers don't exactly give me advantages in skipping stones."

"I just need to warm up," I said quickly, and started to try again.

Now, I'm not saying that Leah is better at skipping stones than me, but on that particular night I might have been a little off my game and the wind conditions worked in her favor. We spent about fifteen minutes silently throwing rocks before Leah spoke again.

"Thanks for talking to me."

"You know I value every moment I'm in your presence."

"Ha ha, you're hilarious. But seriously. It was nice to have someone to unload all of my problems on."

"Hey, we all have things we need to get off of our chests."

"And what about you? Do you have anything you regret?" Leah asked.

My grip on my current stone increased, and I heard a loud crack as the rock began to crumble beneath my fingers. I quickly released it and wiped gritty remains of it off on my pants.

"Regrets? Nah, not really my thing. It doesn't go well with the whole 'soulless vampire' vibe I've got going here."

Leah raised her eyebrows and smirked. "Yeah, I can totally see how chill you are from the way you crushed that rock."

I shrugged. "I was just showing off my immense strength to a pretty girl."

Leah crossed her arms, and I could tell she wasn't going to let it go.

"Fine. Let's see…regrets. Um, I can't get any tattoos because the needles won't pierce my skin. Getting drunk doesn't really work out, even blood spiked with alcohol." I coughed and looked away. "Not that I've, um, tried. And smoking doesn't go well with the whole flammable thing."

Leah rolled her eyes again and laughed. "Oh, because you totally did all of those things before you were turned."

I pretended to look hurt. "You underestimate me. I was a real baddie."

"Oh yeah? What changed?"  
I raised my eyebrows and laughed. "Seriously? I did. Specifically, my human state. Something about being almost drained of blood and turned into a monster changes a man."

"Exactly. You're not even a man anymore. You're a monster."

I shook my finger at her disapprovingly. "That, my dear, is prejudice. Don't judge people by their diets. Unless they're vegan. In that case, go all out."

"You do realize you're the vampire version of a vegan?"

"Really? No wonder I'm so annoying."

Leah smiled at that, but her expression quickly became serious again. "Really, Bryce. I've told you nearly all of my problems, what are yours?"

I shifted uncomfortably, looking everywhere but her. "I'm not really- I'm not really a share and care sort of guy."

"Neither am I, but I just spilled my guts to you."

As much as I hated to admit it, she was right. Leah had trusted me with all of her fears about imprinting and a child, and I had told her almost nothing.

"I had a sister," I said quickly before I could back out. "Her name was Calida. She was- she was probably the most important thing in my life. And- and when I changed-"

I paused, taking a deep breath despite the fact that oxygen was useless. "I was in a dangerous line of work, even when I was still human. Me and a few other guys, we were making a delivery. It shouldn't even have been that dangerous, but I guess some vamp thought we would make a tasty meal.

"It was a blood bath. I shouldn't have lived, but he got to me last and he was only half way through feeding on me when something scared him off. I still don't know what it was. I was half crazy from fear at that point, anyway, and all I could think to do was drag myself back to my apartment.

"Calida found me outside the door, passed out in a pool of my own blood. She must have- she must have thought I was possessed by a demon, or something like that. She dragged me inside, got me onto a bed and surrounded me with crosses. She tried- she tried to help me.

"It didn't really matter in the end. The moment I woke all I could think about was blood, and she- she was the closest warm body. I guess you can imagine what happened after that. I didn't even know what I was doing until after she was already gone. After that, I- well, I ran. I don't know where, or for how long, but I couldn't even look at human blood without thinking of her. Turned to hunting rats, and eventually bigger animals.

"Eventually another vampire, Freda found me. She knew what I could do before I did, and she was never one to pass up an opportunity like that. It was easy to follow her orders and not think about what I had done, and I stayed with her for nearly half a century. I still didn't feed on humans, but I can't tell you how many vampires I killed for her. I'm no where close to a good man, Leah, and I'm not going to pretend that I am."

Leah stared at me silently for a moment. "You killed your sister."

"Yeah," I said quietly, my voice almost breaking. "It was my job to take care of her, you know? But I managed to screw that up, too."

"You didn't know what you were doing."

"I'm not blaming myself for the moments after I changed. I'm blaming myself for the hundreds of little choices that brought me to that moment. All the things that led to me being on that delivery, for the decision to crawl back to the apartment, for not teaching her to defend herself."

"You really think she could have defended herself from a vampire? From a newborn? I'm not sure any human would have been able to do that, let alone a little girl."

"She shouldn't have had to protect herself! I was supposed to protect her!"

"Yeah? You think you're the only one who's killed a family member?" Leah demanded. "My father _died_ because of me. My little brother lost his dad and any chance of a normal life when I phased!"

"But you didn't kill your father! Everything that happened to you was out of your control, and no amount of preparation could have changed what happened to you."

"That doesn't make it any better! I've spent years trying to come to terms with what happened, and if there's one thing I figured out, its that blaming yourself only makes things one hundred times worse. I was so caught up in my own pain that I didn't take the time to realize what I still had: my brother and mom. I nearly lost them, too, because I couldn't see beyond my guilt."

"But you got better," I insisted. "You learned from your mistakes; you became stronger from them. But that's the thing, Leah; I didn't. I just found some other psychopath to follow, and pretended that I wasn't guilty of killing people because she told me to do it. But I did kill people, Leah, even if they were vampires, even if I didn't use my own hands to do it. I told them to tear each other apart, and then stood back and watched. I know what I am, and it's not something that deserves redemption."

"But you stopped, didn't you? You must have gotten out, or you wouldn't be here today."

"I ran away from Freda. But that doesn't mean I'm not still under her control. I murdered for her; I gave her everything, and that kind of stain doesn't just go away. I'm still running."

"So stop!" Leah said sharply. "You're always talking about accepting who you are, about not caring what others think. You never let what others think affect you, Bryce; you've got that part down. But _you've_ got to forgive yourself. How are you ever supposed to stop running if the real person you're running from is you?"

"What makes you think I deserve to stop running?"

"Look, I'm not some sort of saint. So if you're looking for some sort of relief from me, a reassurance that you deserve forgiveness, or an almighty decree that everything's going to be alright, I can't give it to you. All I know is you make me smile, and we've both done horrible things, but maybe that's not the most important thing. I can't be the forgiveness you're looking for, because only you can provide that. But I can tell you that I believe you are worth saving."

The words came out in a rush, and as soon as Leah finished she looked away, still barely willing to admit that she had said them. But she had said them, and she had been right. For so long I had been running away. Running away from my father, what I did to Calida, what I did for Freda. Now, for the first time in forever, I felt like I was running towards something.


	12. The Downside of Caring

Chapter 11

The Downside of Caring

Driving with Brady had become a regular thing, and a few days after the dinner party was no different. He had actually improved his driving somewhat, and I no longer felt like I would throw up all the contents of my stomach every time he tried to turn or stop. We had evolved to the point where we could have an actual conversation without me having to interrupt to point out stop signs, speed limits, or random civilians.

"How's 'Jossa' doing? Still a creepy woman who should find a guy her own age?"

"She's fine," Brady snapped. "And I wish you'd stop saying that."

"Brady, look. An older woman dating a younger guy doesn't make the guy 'mature'. It makes the woman immature, and probably a predator. You haven't even been to college yet, and she's probably married three times and been involved in at least two stolen art heists."

"I don't think you understand how normal human lives work…"

"All I'm saying is that she should know better. Have you even found out her exact age yet?"

"It hasn't come up."

"Hasn't come up? Brady, if you're dating someone and don't know how old they are, that's usually a red flag!"

"Oh yeah? Does Leah know how old you are?" Brady demanded.

"Leah is perfectly aware that I'm fifty nine. But I have the maturity of a fifteen year old, so if anything she's the one dating a younger guy. Besides, I spent most of the last half century following some other older woman around like a lost puppy. Which only makes me more qualified to tell you that 'Jossa' is creepy."

"You dated an older woman?" Brady snorted. "How were you even able to find someone who could stand your face and personality?"

"I think my ability to make people do whatever I wanted kind of made up for the rest of me. She seemed to think so, at least."

"So you got used. That doesn't mean all women are like that."

"Obviously. Leah doesn't think I have any valuable traits in the first place, so there's no way she's using me. But you have to be careful with these things. Don't trust every person you meet."

"Yeah, because you're definitely qualified to give that advice. It's not like the only reason you even started talking to me was to get to Leah or something," Brady snorted.

"I fully admit that my motives were completely impure when I first approached you. But I got what I needed, and I'm still here, so clearly I must be at least somewhat fond of you."

"Gee, thanks, that means a lot."

"No problem. In fact, just to show you how much I somewhat care about you, I'll even let you come over and play board games with me at Jacob's tonight. And totally not just because Leah's busy and I'm bored."

"I've got- I've got plans." The words stumbled out of Brady's mouth, and he was suddenly carefully avoiding my eyes.

"Okay? What are you doing?"

"Nothing."

"Your plans are to do nothing?'

"I- nothing important."

"Dude, I'm not stupid. I can tell when someone's hiding something from me."

"I'm not!"

I raised my eyebrows and stared at him silently.

"I'm really not," Brady stammered weakly. "I just- it's- why do you care, anyway?"

"Am I not allowed to be concerned about my bestie? Who knows what kind of shenanigans you've been getting up to! Drugs, sex, gangs, interpretive dancing, violence…kids these days are crazy!"

"It's nothing," Brady insisted. "Just patrol."

"If it's 'just patrol' why are you suddenly acting so suspicious? Are you sneaking out to see Jossa? Are you two going to elope? I knew she was bad news!"

"It doesn't have anything to do with Jossa," Brady said quickly. "I swear. I just- I need to do something for Jacob."

"Like what? Is he having you deliver drugs? Is Jacob running a drug ring? Is that how the pack pays all of its expenses?"

"Could you stop? It's not Jossa, and it's not drugs. I just need to watch-" Brady stopped abruptly.

"What? What do you need to watch? What are you hiding from me? Is it whatever Jacob and Carlisle have been working on together?"

The immediate red blush that formed across Brady's cheeks was answer enough.

"Oh, come on! They'll trust some teenage werewolf with the secret but not me?"

"Can you blame them?"

"Well, no," I relented. "But that doesn't mean I won't get offended over it."

"Come on, Bryce," Brady wheedled. "It's not like you care about this kind of stuff anyway. It's got nothing to do with Leah, and it's not even that entertaining. Just forget about it."

Brady really should've known more about me by that point, because any time someone told me to forget about something, it automatically became the most important thing in my mind. But I didn't want to worry Brady with my new found interest in Jake and Carlisle's secret, and I didn't want him to try and talk me out of finding whatever they were hiding, so I just nodded and pretended to listen as he talked me out of it.

As soon as we finished the drive I made an excuse about having to hunt some squirrels, and then flashed to Jake's house, coming to a stop inches from his face.

"Dude! I told you to stop doing that!" Jake shouted, stumbling back a few steps.

"Aw, Jakey, you don't trust me? I always stop before I run over you."

"Obviously I don't trust you. You've collided with me at least twenty times before!"

"Yeah, but all those times were intentional. This time, I actually have to be serious with you, so I figured I should leave you standing."

Jake was immediately on his guard. "Why do you need to be serious?"

"Well, Jake, as I'm sure you know, I've recently started spending time with that Brady boy, from Sam's pack."

Jake rolled his eyes. "Yeah, I know. We all know. You let him drive the Cullens' cars in return for information on Leah. You're just lucky I haven't told Carlisle yet."

"Funny that you should mention Carlisle. You see, I've grown somewhat, sort of, just a tiny bit fond of Brady. And, while you know I have no interest in whatever you and Carlisle are conspiring on, I can't help but take interest when you're involving shifters as young as Brady."

"Brady told you?" Jacob asked sharply.

"Brady tried _not_ to tell me, which is why I'm suspicious. See, you and Carlisle working together, that's not too hard to imagine. I mean, you're in love with his granddaughter, so there's got to be some friendship there. But now it's starting to look like both packs of shifters are working with him too, and you have to admit, vampires and werewolves working together? That's enough to make anyone curious."

"Bryce, this isn't something I can just tell you on a whim-"

"Ha! So there is something going on!"

"Obviously." Jake rolled his eyes. "But this is important. Like, crazy important, and we have to be extremely careful in who we tell-"

"So you're telling a seventeen year old kid who couldn't keep a secret to save his life?"

"All of the wolves understand how important this is. But even they don't know all of the details. Carlisle, Sam, and I are the only ones who know everything, and I can't just tell every person who gets curious."

Jacob had on his pack leader face, the one that meant he was determined that whatever he was doing was the right thing and almost nothing could make him change his mind. Obviously talking to him wasn't going to work, so I needed a quick change of tactics.

"Relax," I grinned, flashing my teeth at him. "I've never been big on schemes anyway. You keep on working on your super secret project, and I'll just focus on winning Leah's heart."

Jake shifted uncomfortably. "It's not that we don't trust you-"

"You shouldn't trust me," I interrupted. "I'm not in this to help the people, Jakey. I've got my own best interests at heart, always. That's the difference between you and me."

Jake nodded, not quite managing to keep the relief out of his expression. "So we're cool?"

"Obviously." I gave him my most winning smile. "Just as long as you're not putting Brady in life threatening danger."

Jacob furrowed his brow. "Since when did you care so much about Brady?"

"The little dork has grown on me. Probably because he's an even worse driver than me, so I can feel superior."

"If it means anything, he likes you too."

"Aw, Jakey, that's great! Now I can write 'Brady+Bryce 4ever' on all my notebooks, and finally start signing the anonymous love notes I've been sending him!"

"Joke all you want, but I know you care about him," Jake smirked. "First Leah, now Brady…if you're not careful you might actually become friends with the pack."

"Never fear, Jake; I'll do something to remind them I'm a dirty, no good blood sucker before things get that bad."

Jake's smirk broke out into a full on grin. "You ca-are," he said in a sing-song voice. "Bryce has feelings!"

"Bryce is also a vampire who could rip your head off in an instant if he felt like it."

"As if," Jacob scoffed. "I could take you anytime."

"Not if I convince you to let me win, first."

"Cheater."

"It's only cheating if there are rules to begin with."

"Whatever you say, man," Jake laughed. "And thanks for being so understanding about the whole thing with Carlisle."

"You know me," I grinned. "Always reasonable, level headed, and understanding. I'll see you around."

I turned to go, ignoring the way Jacob's smile faded as he took in my words. Jake had been my best friend long enough to know that I could kind of, sometimes, take things a bit far, so time would only tell how long it would be before he ran after me and made me swear on my mother's grave that I wouldn't interfere with anything. Until then, I had work to do.

I wasn't lying when I told Jacob we were cool, but I might have left out several key pieces of information, such as the fact that I had learned long ago not to trust anybody and I wasn't stupid enough just to ignore whatever the shifters and vamps were working on together.

It wasn't that I didn't trust Jacob. Well, I didn't trust Jacob, but only because I can't remember ever truly trusting anyone except Calida. But anything that required secrecy was bound to be something bad, and I didn't want to be the last one to know if everything was going to blow up in our faces.

It was obvious that I wouldn't get anywhere with any of the wolves, and there was no way one of the Cullens would tell me what was going on, so that meant I had to rely on my excellent sleuthing skills, which basically consisted of sniffing Brady out later that night and catching him in the act of whatever he was doing with Jacob. Until then, I had plenty of time to hang out with Leah before her patrol and let her pretend I was annoying her.

-The Art of Running-

I might have gotten a bit distracted by Leah, because by the time I remembered that I was supposed to be following Brady his scent was hours old. I followed it out of town and deep into the woods, far farther than I had ever gone before with Jacob or the others. His trail twisted and turned, leading me so deep that I would be hopelessly lost without his scent to guide me.

It was the typical smell of wet dog magnified a hundred times over, mixed in with the cologne he seemed to think helped him get girls, the hamburger he had eaten for dinner, and there- the coppery smell of blood, too sickly sweet to be anything but his.

Brady wasn't supposed to be bleeding. He was supposed to be bored, at home, watching TV, doing whatever human teenagers his age did these days. Not out in the woods, with the scent of blood strengthening every second as I moved forward, far too much for it to be a harmless scratch.

I pushed forward, racing through the trees as fast as I could, screeching to an abrupt halt as I entered a small clearing, the smell of blood now nearly overwhelming. There was something lying on the ground, a prone shape drenched in a crimson red that wasn't- couldn't possibly be-

Brady let out a strangled moan, his bloody chest trembling violently as he sucked in a rattling breath. "Jo- Joss-"

I stumbled back, nearly collapsing against a tree behind me. No, no, this wasn't supposed to be happening. No one was supposed to be hurt; not here, not now that I had finally started building something for myself.

It wasn't like I had bargained for this. My goal was to get Leah, not end up actually caring about other people. But here I was, my whole world collapsing as I stared at Brady's shuddering form.

I had to do something. I had to find someone, stop the bleeding, get help- I took a step forward, my eyes completely focused on the dark red blood that pooled beneath Brady, trying desperately to keep calm.

An explosive force slammed into my back, sending me sprawling across the ground. My face smashed into the pooling blood, and an iron grip closed around my neck, twisting my head at an unnatural angle until I was staring up at the sky, everything spinning.

I opened my mouth to scream, shout- do anything, but before I could a damp rag was jammed back into my mouth, pushing back so far that I began to choke and gag. A putrid taste filled my mouth, and the last thing I saw was a pair of fiery red eyes glaring down at me as everything went black.


	13. Enter the (True) Hero

Chapter 12

Enter the Hero

I opened my eyes to a pounding head and the dizzying sensation of waking up for the first time in decades. I was slumped on a small metal chair, tightly bound ropes jerking me back when I tried to move. This shouldn't have been possible. Vampires couldn't be knocked out, and we certainly couldn't be restrained by some measly ropes. But I felt like all of the strength had drained from my body, black spots racing across my vision as my stomach rolled in protest.

"Your leader should be pleased." A sickeningly familiar voice floated through the darkness. "It appears his concoction works."

Freda stepped into my view, smiling down at me with something that almost resembled fondness on her face. She looked exactly the same as all those years ago, as if she had just stepped out of a photo. Thick black hair tumbled over her shoulders, her skin pale and almost stretched looking, a smile forming on her thick lips. A bright yellow dress fluttered around her shoulders, swaying gently every time she moved.

"Have you missed me, Pet?"

A buzzing filled my ears, every nerve tingling with horrible chills. This wasn't real. This couldn't be real, because Freda was dead. I had killed her, I had watched her burn-

Freda clucked her tongue disapprovingly, moving forward until she stood directly in front of me. "You know I hate repeating myself, Brycon."

"You're not real," I choked out. "None of this is real; I'm dreaming, I-"

She cut me off with a sharp slap, the pain that blossomed across my cheek stronger than any pain I could remember feeling in years.

"None of that," she scolded. "We have business to attend to; there is no time for one of your tantrums."

"I- I don't-"

"You always were so slow, Pet," she sighed, smoothing her thumb across the skin she had slapped with something akin to affection.

I didn't need oxygen, but suddenly everything was reduced to the desperate struggle to breath, each inhale coming faster and faster until the roar of air was the only thing that filled my ears.

"Stop that," Freda snapped. "You are not a child, Brycon."

Her voice seemed to cut through the fog that filled my mind, and I choked back my next breath and tried to steady myself. After all these years, Freda could still get to me with a single command.

"What did you do to me?" I asked, forcing my voice to remain steady. There was nothing Freda despised more than weakness.

"I'm surprised you didn't know. Why, I heard the rumors months ago. A coven and a wolf pack working together on something, a toxin that could affect even supernatural beings? Why, Pet, you must know I couldn't resist."

"What are you talking about?"

"Your precious coven, Brycon, the one you've tried so hard to replace me with. Why else would they return here, when the land belongs to the wolves?"

"They're not- the shifters and the vampires work together-"

"For a time, maybe. But such a diplomacy would never last. Not unless they both had something to gain from it."

"Not everyone has ulterior motives, Freda. The shifters and the vampires have made peace, here."

"Do you really believe that?" Freda asked pityingly. "That the whole world is pure, and I was just the evil temptress who corrupted you? I would think you're a bit smarter than that, Pet. Besides, it does not matter what you think. The toxin exists, and I think it has exhibited its powers on you quite well. A stronger dose would have killed you, of course, but I think I shall save that for later."

I had to remain calm. I needed to keep Freda talking, find out as much as I could before she got bored. "How did you find the toxin?"

"I'm creative, Pet. It was easy enough to find a young werewolf to fool. He was almost too eager to believe that I loved him. You should have heard the stories I told him, darling. A life of hardships, only to be turned against my will a few years ago, still so young that the red hadn't yet disappeared from my eyes. I'm surprised he hasn't mentioned me. And you seemed so concerned about him when you found him earlier."

"Brady? _You're_ the cougar who's dating Brady?"

Freda paused for a moment, frowning. "I am not any kind of wildcat."

"Freda, this is terrible! You don't understand; me hanging out with his girlfriend while he's not around totally breaks the best friend code!"

Freda's upper lip curled into a sneer. "Always so funny, aren't you Brycon? Always another joke. But it won't get you out of this mess, I'm afraid."

"But seriously, Freda. Dating a seventeen year old? I mean, you were cutting it close with me; now you're bordering on pedophilia."

Freda waved an impatient hand. "I was merely using him to get to the potion. Young boys, always so eager to do anything for love. Of course, I didn't even have to pretend to offer you love, did I? You were just desperate to have someone to tell you what to do." She ran a hand through my hair and over my neck, smirking as I fruitlessly tried to jerk away.

"I've missed you, Pet," she murmured, grabbing my chin and forcing it upwards until I met her eyes. "We have so much to catch up on."

"You- you don't want to do this," I choked out, but she only laughed.

"Oh Pet, you don't think your little party trick is actually going to work on me, do you? You're _weak._"

"You want- you want to let me go," I gasped.

Her hand moved so fast I didn't have time to blink before a blinding pain flared on my cheek.

"You don't tell me what I want," she snarled. "What I _want_ is to kill every last one of those pathetic dogs you've grown so fond of, and then I'll show you what it means to disobey me."

"That's not what you want. You want to let me go. You want to leave and never come-" Another smack turned my words into a gasp of pain.

"Weak," she hissed. "You should never have left me, Brycon. I could have given you the world. Now look at you. Pathetic."

The overwhelming need to apologize, to beg her to give me another chance and promise her everything I had consumed me. Because that was Freda's power: twisting someone's thoughts and emotions until all they could think about was pleasing her, until everything in the world depended on just one look of approval or smile of praise. And no matter how many years passed, no matter how far I ran, I could never quite shake off that need to please her. To fall on my knees and beg for forgiveness for even thinking of going against her.

She was right; my powers wouldn't work on her. The ability to convince someone of something relied on a basic confidence that whatever you were saying was correct. Maybe I had that when I first left her and the power of defying her still gave me a heady rush, but now all of that former confidence was replaced with a bone deep terror. She was stronger than me, and there was nothing I could do to deny that.

Freda froze, tilting her head to the side and turning. "But it appears we have company. One of your little wolf friends must have followed you home. Come join us, dear; I do love an audience."

Another familiar scent permeated the air, and I squeezed my eyes, letting out a breath of resignation. "Leah. How did you find me?"

"I smelled you on patrol, and I wanted to make sure you weren't getting into any trouble. Then I- I found Brady."

"Is he?" I couldn't bring myself to finish the sentence, but Freda had no such qualms.

"Oh, Pet, did you care about the boy? I'm afraid I might have gotten a bit rough with him."

"You didn't kill him," Leah spat out. "He survived; he's already healing. You can't kill all of us; we will destroy you."

"You think I meant to kill him?" Freda laughed. "I just needed the boy out of the way long enough to get what I came for. Brycon's appearance was just a pleasant surprise. And as soon as I finish dealing with you, I will finish what I started and exterminate every last one of you filthy wolves."

"Not if I kill you first."

Freda cocked her head to the side, a deadly playing across her lips. "You think you can fight me? You, the sad little wolf girl who my Brycon has become so enamored with? My dear, you cannot even save yourself, let alone him. He is mine now. He always has been, no matter how much he likes to play pretend with you."

Leah rolled her shoulders, readying her stance and glaring at Freda. "That's an awful lot of big talk from a lady who looks like she's been dead for the last century. Oh wait, you have. I'm just going to make it permanent."

"I will kill you slowly," Freda sneered. "I will tear you apart, piece by piece, show my Brycon the heart he has been so desperate for and crush it in my hands. I will destroy you, you pathetic, wretched, worthless, _bitch_-"

Leah lunged forward, phasing half way through her jump and colliding with Freda, sending them both tumbling to the ground. Wolf and vampire wrestled in a deadly embrace, the sounds of snarling and screeching metal filling the air. Leah clamped her jaws around Freda's arm and swung her wildly, but Freda flipped as she moved, landing on to of Leah's back and locking her arms around her neck, squeezing with all of her strength.

Leah twisted and bucked wildly, rolling over until Freda was crushed beneath her, slamming her head onto the ground. The fight was a blur of moving limbs and flashing teeth, moving so fast that I could barely keep track as they began to wrestle once again.

Leah was strong; there was no denying that. But Freda had been fighting, killing, for years, and her experience became apparent the longer the fight progressed. She slammed Leah against a nearby wall, the sickening crunch of bones followed by a strangled yelp of pain as she smashed her head into the ground again. Leah slumped across the floor, her fur flaked with blood as she panted desperately.

"Pathetic dog," Freda snarled as she kicked her in the stomach with an unearthly strength. "I should keep you alive, show you what it means to defy me. But I think I shall try the toxin your leaders have been working on instead. After all, I must know if it works on werewolves, too. A deadly dose this time, of course."

"No," I gasped out, but both Leah and Freda ignored me as Freda withdrew a small vial of clear looking liquid from her dress.

"Such a small thing," she mused, tilting the bottle back and forth in the light. "Hard to imagine it can cause such destruction."

Leah let out a weak snarl, beginning to crawl forward, but Freda brought her foot down on her shoulder, another crunch of bones echoing through the room.

"You are a bad dog," she hissed, kneeling down until her face was nearly level with Leah's, prying open her jaws with an iron grip. "And bad dogs must be put down."

"No," I forced out, a little louder this time, and Freda paused.

"Are you concerned, Brycon? I warned you about getting too attached. It only leads to disappointment."

"You can't- you can't kill her-"

"I can do whatever I wish, Pet. And you are too weak to stop me."

Leah growled again, snapping at Freda's hands fruitlessly.

"She does not know when to stop fighting, does she?" Freda mused. "Her persistence is admirable, even if it is pointless."

I began to bow my head in beaten submission, but one last whimper from Leah stopped me. She stared at me through strangely human eyes, a challenge still shining in them even as she lay, nearly broken before Freda. Her meaning was clear even through the haze of pain. Why wasn't I fighting? Why was I sitting back and letting this happen, when I had told her that I would love her, would fight for her?

I wasn't strong. I knew that, no matter how much I liked to pretend otherwise around her. Freda would always have a power over me, always wriggle into the shadows of my mind and whisper doubts and weaknesses. I wasn't strong. But Leah was.

Leah was powerful, and beautiful, and caring, no matter how much she tried to hide it. And above all, Leah was strong, in everything she did. She was strong without me, but she was also strong with me, and when I was with her, I felt like maybe I could have some of that strength. And Freda couldn't destroy that strength, no matter how hard she tried.

"Stop." My voice rang out across the room, laced with a power that I had never heard before.

Both Leah and Freda froze, Freda's grip on Leah's jaw relaxing ever so slightly.

"You're not going to do this," I said, and I found myself completely believing every word I was saying. "You will let her go, and you will step away. And then you're going to open up that glass, and you're going to drink every. Last. Drop. And do you know why, Freda?"

Freda stayed frozen, still staring at me with wide, almost empty eyes. My last sentence came out as a snarl, the same words that she had said all those years ago when she first tried to kill me. "Because I said so."

Freda stumbled back, turning to face me completely. Her hand moved as if on its own accord, trembling fingers untwisting the cap and bringing it to her mouth. She paused, her hand shaking so hard that little drops spilled onto her skin, sizzling where they landed.

"You will do it now," I said, a strength in my voice I had never heard before.

Freda tipped her head back, gulping down the liquid as she began to shudder, tremors wracking her entire body as she collapsed to the ground, coughing desperately. The empty vial fell from her limp fingers, shattering against the floor in an explosion of glass that rang out in the suddenly silent room, Leah's labored breathing the only other sound. Freda's body gave one last violent jerk before she went still, bright red droplets of blood forming at the edges of her mouth.

"She's dead," I breathed out, staring at Freda's limp body in frozen awe. "She's dead."

It didn't seem possible. Freda had dominated my life for the past fifty years, still there even in the years after I left her. She was an inescapable force, something that could never be truly comprehended. Not a corpse slumped against the ground, her pale white skin covered in a spider web of cracks and dust forming across her lips.

And, as I stared at her prone form, still struggling to understand how she could truly be the being that had a hold on me for as long as I could remember, the most important thought came to me. For the first time in forever, I could finally stop running.


	14. Epilogue

Epilogue

Time seemed to move differently after I stopped running. Everything slowed down, suddenly becoming hundreds of different moments and experiences instead of the blur I had become used to. I was truly living for the first time since my death, finally stopping to let emotions run their course.

This time, there wasn't the constant worry that Freda might have survived. I couldn't stand to stay and watch the last time, but now I knew she was dead, and it was like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. Carlisle had done something with the serum that absolutely everyone but me knew about, but whenever I asked either Leah would kiss me, Jacob would punch me, or Brady would ask to go driving. For a while I thought I had a pretty good deal; whenever I wanted to make out with Leah I could just ask about the serum again, but after thirteen drives with Brady over a three day period, I realized I might not have thought it through all the way.

I became almost a constant presence at Leah's side, but something fundamental had changed. Suddenly she was looking at me and seeing me, and I was looking at her without the cloud of Freda hovering over me.

There was a window in her house, a small window seat that could barely fit one person that looked out across the beach. Sometimes we would curl up there, watching the droplets of rain chase each other and reveling in each other's presence. Today was one of those days, a peace like I had never known settling over me.

Leah lay with her head against my chest, her eyes almost closed and her breaths coming slower and slower. My arms encircled her completely, holding on as if I would never let go. But not cuddling, because we certainly didn't cuddle. That was one of the ground rules. That, and no nicknames, no 'dates', no surprises, and no presents. Come to think of it, I wasn't very good at following Leah's rules.

I leaned down until my mouth was up against her ear, her dark hair tickling the edges of my lips. "I'm pretty sure I'm in love with you."

Leah stiffened for a second, her hands curling into fists, and the peaceful expression gone from her face. "New rule. No saying things like that."

"Even if it's true?"

_"Especially _if it's true."

"It's not my fault you're so easy to fall in love with. I'm just a helpless victim."

Leah frowned and sat up completely, glancing at the space between us. "Does this count as cuddling?"

"Nah. I'd say it's just pre-making out." Making out was one of the few things that were definitely allowed.

Leah nodded and settled back onto my chest. "Good. But seriously, no more saying things like that."

I let out a melodramatic sigh. "If you insist. But I'll still think it." I kissed just below her earlobe in the place that always made her squirm. "Every time I see you, I'll think 'I'm in love with her.' And we'll both know what I'm thinking."

"Why do I put up with you?" Leah grumbled.

"Probably out of pity. You know, first it was the pity date, and then the pity kiss, and then the pity s-"

"Shut up!" Leah interrupted, almost smiling. "I think I might be under your mind control. That would explain why I don't kill you every time you open your mouth."

"Hmmm, I don't think so. You don't seem to need any persuasion when it comes to me."

Leah grunted but didn't say anything else, just grabbed my hand in a rare display of affection and closed her eyes again. I leaned my head back against the couch, trying to memorize every detail of her body against mine. This moment, right here, right now, was what I lived for. Was what I could keep on living for.

And for a while it didn't matter that the Cullens were leaving and Leah and I would have to face up to the fact that I was most likely staying behind for her. It didn't matter that sometimes she would wake up crying out Sam's name, or I would flinch when she touched my neck. All that mattered was her face turning upward, her lips brushing against mine, and the words whispered so softly that they blurred together with the steady beat of the rain, barely discernable. "I'm pretty sure I'm in love with you too."

**Thank you so much to everyone who read the story, followed, favorited, and reviewed! It means so much that you guys enjoyed my writing. I hope you like the ending, and if you have any questions feel free to pm me. **


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